Photo by Christian Erfurt on Unsplash

One of the common refrains I hear among pastors when I talk with them is that they are tired, rundown, going on fumes, and some of them, going through the motions. And that makes sense when you look at the past few years, but the reality is you can’t lead and live for a long time when you are tired. 

You can survive, but you aren’t thriving. 

What happens when you live and lead tired?

You have a shorter fuse, have cloudy judgment and struggle to make good decisions. You can fall into temptations and unhealthy patterns. Your relationships suffer, and ultimately, you coast on your gifts as you don’t have the mental and physical energy to move forward. 

Now, this can be seasonal. This happens in life. There are busy and slow seasons in all walks of life. 

This isn’t about a season in life but a regular pattern for many pastors and leaders. 

The other day, I talked with a pastor who said, “I just feel spread thin, and I don’t feel like I’m moving anything forward substantially.”

Here’s why this matters: If this pastor isn’t careful, he will feel like he isn’t accomplishing anything, that he isn’t “winning,” and the people in his church will slowly start to feel like nothing is moving forward. Churches do not have to continually move forward to be healthy; there is an important season where “the ground needs to be still” so that things can be ready for the future. But that’s not what this pastor was talking about. 

If that’s you, what do you do?

I think you first have to be honest about where you are, how tired you are, and how much fuel you have in your tank. Once you can articulate that, here are a few questions to work through: 

How did you get here? You didn’t all of a sudden get busy and tired. You didn’t wake up one day demoralized and deflated in ministry. No, this happens slowly, like a leak in a tire. 

How did you get here? What choices did you make or not make that brought you here? 

It could be as simple as not getting enough sleep, not eating healthy, or exercising. You might have slipped in your spiritual practices or other rhythms that keep you healthy. 

This is incredibly important because often hidden in what got us here will help get us back to a healthy, sustainable pace. 

What will refill your tank? When I’m exhausted, it is hard to articulate what will fill me up again; when that is hard to tell, it feels even more deflating. 

But look back over your life: what did the excellent seasons have in common, what things do you enjoy, what brings a smile to your face and lightheartedness to your life? Who are the people who make you laugh until it hurts, and who do you want to be around? Are there places (the woods, mountains, beach, coffee shop) in which you love spending time?

To refill your tank, you need to know what these people and places are so that you can make sure they are a part of your calendar because they are easy to crowd out. 

What changes do you need to make to live and lead at a sustainable pace? This can feel like an impossible question to answer when you are tired. 

Another way to ask it is the question my counselor asks me whenever I tell him I feel overwhelmed or tired or during a busy season “What do you need to make it through this week? This month? What do you have to get done? What would you like to get done?”

This is where the work is put in to move forward, creating a plan you can stick with. Often, we overestimate what we will be able to do, but be realistic about what it will take to lead and live at a sustainable pace. Layout when you do your best work and block that time off, so you aren’t stressed. Schedule in your personal growth, exercise, and relationship time. Have a clear plan for sleep and eating and how you will stay on track. 

All of these things go into leading and living at a sustainable pace.