My Favorite Books of 2022

Photo by Tom Hermans on Unsplash

It’s that time of year. When I look back over what I’ve read and list out my favorite books of the year! 

Admittedly, I read fewer non-fiction books this past year. Part of that was the energy our move across the country took and settling into life here. I’m also finding that I need to give my brain a break and enjoy more fiction and historical books.

Below is a photo of my favorite books of the year, with my favorite one on top. To see everything I read this year, go here.

If you’re curious about past years’ lists, click on the numbers: 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2018, 2019, 2020, and 2021.

First, the fun books!

Here are my 6 favorite novels of the year:

  1. The Son
  2. Ordinary grace
  3. City on fire
  4. Violin conspiracy
  5. Manhunt: The 12-Day Chase for Lincoln’s Killer and Grace: President Obama and Ten Days in the Battle for America

Here are my favorite books of the year:

10. The Power of Place: Choosing Stability in a Rootless Age. I didn’t read this before we moved, but it said many things we have thought about over the years about the power and importance of place in our lives. I put a big emphasis on place, and this book was helpful to have a theology on it. Suppose you are trying to find your place in this world, where you should live, etc. This is a helpful book on that. 

9. Invitation to a Journey: A Road Map for Spiritual Formation. I have had this book on my shelf for a long time and finally got around to reading it. Wow. The section on spiritual formation and personality was fascinating. It helped name some things in my life that I needed to be aware of and some deficiencies I can easily fall into as a pastor. 

8. How Minds Change: The Surprising Science of Belief, Opinion, and Persuasion. Everyone who preaches and communicates should read this book. Most sermons go after the wrong argument, and this book was eye-opening to what changes people’s minds from a scientific perspective.

7. Letters to a Young Pastor: Timothy Conversations between Father and Son. This book was so rich and soul-stirring. Eugene Peterson wrote letters to his son as his son started in ministry. This is a book I’ll come back to in the coming years.

6. A Non-Anxious Presence: How a Changing and Complex World will Create a Remnant of Renewed Christian Leaders. If there is one book pastors need to read as we move into a post-pandemic, divisive world, this is it. It names what we have felt and experienced and a way forward. 

5. The 6 Types of Working Genius: A Better Way to Understand Your Gifts, Your Frustrations, and Your Team. I love personality tests and explaining why we do what we do in work, life and relationships. This book was something we took our staff and elders through and has been incredibly helpful in understanding our wiring as a team. 

4. Attached to God: A Practical Guide to Deeper Spiritual Experience. While I disagree with the author on some theological areas, this book was beneficial for me to understand my relationship with God and how I process that based on what I’ve experienced in life and relationships. 

3. The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure. I have recommended this book to every parent of teenagers since I read it—a must-read for parents. 

2. Leadership on the Line: Staying Alive Through the Dangers of Change. This is a bit of cheating since I’ve read this book three times, but it is still relevant and spot-on. If you are leading change of any kind, this book has to be at the top of your list. This book has saved me many times as I’ve led change processes over the years. 

1. From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life. I’m starting to read and think more about the second half of life as I get older, and this book answered many questions and helped me think through a roadmap for my future steps. If you’re over 40, you should read this book. 

Friday Five

Can you believe it is 2021?!

It is almost hard to believe that the calendar has turned and it is a new year, but it does feel good. Even if the cloud of covid is still hanging over us, it has been a few months since I shared a Friday Five, but I thought the first full week of 2021 would be a good time to dust it off.

So here goes:

Favorite books:

I read two books over the Christmas break that were both incredibly helpful and timely. One was The Motive: Why So Many Leaders Abdicate Their Most Important Responsibilities by Patrick Lencioni. It was timely because this a great book to look at the heart behind your leadership. Doing that over the New Year was good for me as I think about where I am in life and look forward to 2021 and beyond. 

The second book was Future Church: Seven Laws of Real Church Growth by Will Mancini. This book, every pastor needs to read and wrestle with as we think about what ministry will actually look like in the future and how to reach people best. 

Favorite podcasts:

One of my favorite podcasts is The Learning Leader. Recently, Ryan Hawk released two episodes (How To Create A Generosity Flywheel, Make The Trust Wager, & Earn WHO Luck and The Art Of Getting People To Want To Do What Must Be Done), Jim Collins. There is so much in both of these episodes, especially for pastors.

Favorite blog posts:

Carey Nieuwhof every year posts his church trends. This week he shared 8 trends that churches need to be aware of as we move into 2021. Some highlights to me: #1 is something all communicators and worship leaders have to think about as they prepare each week and lead from the stage, #2 & #5 closely echoes Mancini’s book about what the future of the church will look like, I love the creativity and possibilities of #4, and #6 is one that cannot be overlooked because that will have an enormous impact on what churches do (especially as it relates to who they are trying to reach and connect with).

Wednesday Mind Dump…

  • While I haven’t been preaching over the last 3 weeks, I’ve been in the throws of our hiring process at Revolution Church.
  • While I have loved talking to candidates, I know that hiring is something I do not want to spend the majority of my time doing.
  • Way too detailed.
  • If you’re looking for help in hiring or team building, check out these books: The Ideal Team Player: How to Recognize and Cultivate The Three Essential Virtues by Patrick Lencioni, It’s Not the How or the What but the Who: Succeed by Surrounding Yourself with the Best and Great People Decisions: Why They Matter So Much, Why They are So Hard, and How You Can Master Them, both by Claudio Fernandez Araoz.
  • I am blown away by the caliber of candidates, both inside and outside of our church.
  • The potential for this role is huge for our church and city.
  • Cory taught a new song on Sunday at Revolution, What a Beautiful Name.
  • It was such a powerful moment.
  • Found afterwards that some reformed pastors don’t like the song because the line “Jesus didn’t want heaven without us so he brought heaven down.”
  • I get the self-centered fear that pastors might have, but being mad about that line makes it sound like Jesus could do without us in heaven or is indifferent to us.
  • Makes God too cold in my opinion.
  • Needless to say, we’ll be keeping that song.
  • I had chills as our church belted out the bridge: You have no rival, You have no equal.
  • Wow.
  • Monday night we pulled together many of our leaders at Revolution and shared with them a clearer discipleship grid for our church.
  • I was convicted last year that we have not clearly defined what a healthy, mature disciple is and how to get there.
  • We are still building it out, but the foundation is there and I am excited about it and the potential growth our people will experience.
  • Our hiring right now is a part of this journey.
  • One of the things I’m most excited at Revolution right now is how healthy our leadership team is.
  • We are stronger, working together better, hanging out, laughing.
  • It is fantastic.
  • This hasn’t always been a priority for me and it has shown in our church and that makes me sad looking back on it.
  • I took Ava to see Beauty and the Beast over the weekend.
  • Super fun.
  • Not everyone will appreciate this, but if you are a theological nerd you will.
  • I’m super geeked out about the sermon calendar for the next year at Revolution.
  • Well, I gotta preach on Sunday, so back at it…

Patrick Lencioni on “The Ideal Team Player” from the Leadership Summit 2016

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I’m at the leadership summit with the team from Revolution Church. This is by far the best leadership conference of the year. This is my 13th summit and every year, God stretches me and challenges me. So much wisdom and inspiration wrapped up into two days. I always blog my notes, so if you can’t attend or missed something, I’ve got you covered.

Patrick Lencioni talked from his new book The Ideal Team Player: How to Recognize and Cultivate The Three Essential Virtues, which I think is a must read for every leader. His insights have been incredibly helpful to me.

Here are some takeaways:

  • The ideal team player is humble, hungry and smart.
  • If a person possesses these 3 virtues, they can overcome the 5 dysfunctions of a team. 

Humble

  • Lacking self confidence is lacking humility.
  • Humility is not saying, “I don’t need to be heard.”
  • Humility is thinking about yourself less.

Hungry

  • Hungry person has a strong work ethic.
  • They hate being considered a slacker.
  • They will do whatever is necessary to get it done.
  • This is the hardest to instill in someone.

Smart

  • Smart is not intellectual smarts, it is common sense around people.
  • People who are good at practicing EQ.
  • They know what they say to others and how it impacts them.
  • Hiring for intellectual smarts is not a good idea.

Humble, but not hungry or smart (The Pawn)

  • They aren’t effective on a team.
  • They are a good neighbor, but they don’t get something done.
  • They don’t have initiative to rise up the ranks.

Hungry, but not humble or smart (Bull Dozer)

  • Lots of drive and ambition, but they can’t work with others.
  • They leave a trail of dead bodies around them.

Smart, but not humble or hungry (The Charmer)

  • They are funny, they don’t get things done.
  • They aren’t hard working and they aren’t interested in other people’s success.

Humble and hungry, but not smart (The accidental mess maker)

  • They have good intentions, they want to get things done, but they aren’t smart emotionally.
  • Cared about the world and wanted to help people but said things he didn’t mean to.
  • Their intentions are good.

Humble and smart, but not hungry (Loveable slacker)

  • These people survive in organizations a long time.
  • They mean well and people like them.
  • They just don’t want to do that much work, they do just enough work to make it hard for you to do something about it.
  • Hard workers get really frustrated by this person.

Hungry and smart, but not humble (Skillful politician)

  • They are ambitious and hard driving and know how to make themselves look humble. They convince people that they care about the team.
  • They are often charming and driven.

Application

  • Go first as a leader.
  • Find out what your teams are like and what they are lacking.
  • You have to have the courage to let your people know where they stand and what they need to improve on and to constantly remind them (not your spouse or co-workers) when they are doing it.

How to hire team players

  • We overemphasize technical skills and what is measurable.
  • Know what you are looking for.
  • Don’t get caught up in what “you think you should look for.”
  • Behavior always rises to the top.
  • To interview someone, get them out of the office to get to know them.
  • Don’t overlook red flags and gut feelings.
  • Ask people the same question more than once.
  • Ask what other people would say about them on something, people are more honest when they tell you what other people would say.
  • Scare someone with sincerity, tell them what you are fanatical about as a church. Tell them if they line up, they’ll love it and if they aren’t, they will hate working here.

The Most Important Thing for your Family…Right Now

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One of the things that Patrick Lencioni suggests that families do in The Three Big Questions for a Frantic Family: A Leadership Fable About Restoring Sanity To The Most Important Organization In Your Life is to ask, “Over the next three to six months, what is the most important thing for our family to accomplish?”

This has been incredibly helpful and liberating for our family.

It is easy to look at a book like this and think, “I need to change my schedule, cut things out, get out of debt, work on my health and waistline, let go of things in my past, and deal with hidden sins.” It can be overwhelming. And that is just you. When you bring a spouse and kids into the picture, it becomes incredibly daunting.

That is why this question is so helpful.

What is the most important change you can make right now? What would bring the most freedom to your family and life right now? What would bring the biggest change to your life right now? Sometimes this can last for more than six months or less than three. Debt can take a while to get out of, and so can losing weight, but once the habit is created, I think you can move on to a new one.

This also does something else for you, and it is an important psychological reality: it provides a win.

We all like to win. We all like to feel as if results are happening, especially men. We want to know that the work we are putting in is paying off and moving the ball forward. By looking to a short-term goal like this, you are able to see that something is happening.

*This is an excerpt from my brand new book, Breathing Room: Stressing Less & Living More. Click on the link to purchase it.

3 Strikes and a Good Idea

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In Leadership Blindspots: How Successful Leaders Identify and Overcome the Weaknesses That Matter author Robert Bruce Shaw talks about the 3 strike rule used by Mark Ronald, former CEO of BAE Systems, Inc. The idea comes that not every decision needs to be resolved right away. Even in a fast paced environment like our culture today, you can sit on ideas.

For me, whenever someone says, “I need to know now” my response is almost always, “Well if you need to know now, the answer is no.” I don’t like to feel backed into a corner and wise decisions are rarely made in a rush.

According to Ronald, “any concern that affects the whole organization should be given 3 opportunities for a hearing by the leader and his or her team.” He goes on, “Each time the same issue surfaces, the individual advocating the position has a responsibility to either present new date or analysis that has not been heard before – or to cultivate further support from others who were not present or supportive in earlier discussions.”

One of the things people often do when advocating an idea is bring the same stats, data, passion, etc. to a discussion. Not new information.

According to Ronald, after 3 times though, the idea is dead in the water and not discussed again.

If you can’t get buy in from the people above you after 3 tries, you either didn’t do your homework, the organization isn’t ready for it, or the church will miss an opportunity.

If you aren’t in charge though, you can only control the data you bring in your 3 tries.

Let’s say you are not the lead pastor at your church and you bring an idea to the elders or lead pastor and they shoot it down. Instead of walking away frustrated, saying they have no idea what they are talking about or how they are irrelevant and just don’t get it. Ask them if you can do some more work on the idea and present it again. If it is a valid idea, they should say yes.

The next time you see a problem that you bring to your boss’s attention, also bring a solution with it. Your boss does not want to solve your problems, they want you to. You are the leader of your area, act like it.

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Being a Leader People Want to Follow

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I love the way Mark Miller writes. He is very similar to Patrick Lencioni in writing business/leadership fables. His latest book The Heart of Leadership: Becoming a Leader People want to Follow (kindle version) is no different.

Here are a few things I highlighted:

  • If your heart is not right, no one cares about your leadership skills.
  • I’ll let you in on a little discussed fact about leadership: As important as the skills are, lack of skills is not what derails most leaders; skills are too easy to learn. If you want to predict people’s ultimate success as leaders, evaluate not their skills but their leadership character.
  • There is a lot more to leadership than great individual work
  • You can lead, with or without, a title. If you wait until you get a title, you could wait forever.
  • Ninety percent of our success as leaders will be determined by what’s below the waterline. It’s our leadership character that ultimately drives what we do, and why. It is a true reflection of who we really are as human beings.
  • Leadership character is the primary driver of your success as a leader.
  • The lack of skills is not what derails most leaders—skills are too easy to learn. It is ultimately leadership character that determines our opportunity for influence and impact.
  • When leaders fail to thrive, the culprit is often their leadership character, not their lack of skills.
  • The servant leader constantly works to help others win.
  • Don’t confuse opportunity with leadership.
  • Get ready to lead and opportunities to lead will not be your problem.
  • Many people in the world see events as they are; leaders are different in that they see things that could be. And the future they see is always a better version of the present. We believe we can make a difference; we think we can make the world, or at least our part of it, better. Leaders are generally more optimistic than nonreaders.
  • People generally rise to the level of expectations placed on them.
  • When faced with a challenging or difficult situation, the best leaders most often respond with courage; less mature leaders, or nonleaders often choose another path—a path with less risk, less conflict, and less personal discomfort.
  • Leaders usually don’t wait—they initiate.
  • Leaders get what they create and what they allow.
  • Leaders respond with courage when they: Articulate the vision for the future. Build relationships with challenging people. Challenge people to grow and change. Mend broken relationships. Confront difficult problems. Make hard or unpopular decisions.
  • When leaders lead well, not everyone is going to be happy.
  • If there were no challenge, there would be no need for courage—or leadership.
  • To blame others is not the path leaders take. Leaders accept responsibility, in part, because they are sold out to the vision.
  • Leaders are different. They see the world differently and they cultivate different character traits.

If you are a leader and you are looking for a quick, insightful leadership book to read, this is it.

If you want to see some of the past books I’ve reviewed, go here.

Creating a Personal/Family Mission Statement

Family Mission Statement

Yesterday, I talked about how to create a lasting, worthwhile legacy as a man and family. Many people took the next step of “creating a personal/family mission statement.” This can be a daunting, overwhelming task.

Katie and I went through this practice last year. To help us, we each reach through Patrick Lencioni’s book Three Questions for a Frantic FamilyYou can read my review of the book here.

You need to know this up front:

  • This process is incredibly freeing.
  • There is no right or wrong mission statement. It is your life, your family, you get to define it. So don’t compare to others.
  • Lastly, future generations are affected by this statement. This will define how you spend your time, your money, who you are friends with, where you will worship Jesus, etc. Your grandkids will feel the affect of this statement and if you don’t have one.

Why do this?

If you don’t do this, your family and you personally wander around aimlessly. How do you make a decision when both options seem good? Without a mission statement you guess and hope you are right. With a mission statement, decisions become easier. You are also able to evaluate things more clearly.

Let’s get started.

Start by listing all the things that describe your family. Not what you hope your family or life is, but what you really are. What is important to you? What matters most? What things will you fight til the death on? This list should be exhaustive. You are listing everything you can think of.

Now, start paring it down. Are there words that mean the same thing or can be combined? You are looking for about 5 words to describe your family or you personally. You want it to be short enough to fit on a T-shirt so you remember it.

Now that you have your statement comes a great addition that Lencioni calls “The rallying cry.” This is what you is the most important thing for your family to accomplish in the next 2-6 months. Maybe it is debt, a health issue, a learning issue for a child, your marriage. It is, outside of the normal things your family does, the one thing you have to do in the next 2-6 months for your family to go to the next level. Accomplishing this, would mean a whole new ballgame for your family.

One you have your “Rallying cry” what do you need to do to accomplish this? List all the things it will take.

Got it.

Okay, now share it with a close friend or two. This can be incredibly scary. Ask them to listen as you read it and give feedback. Are the words you used to describe your family, what your family is? Do they see a different value system than you do? You want to pick close friends for this.

Once you feel confident, put the mission statement and the rallying cry in a place where you will see it on a regular basis to remind you and keep you on track.

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The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else in Business

Anything Patrick Lencioni writes, I’m going to read. His latest book The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else in Business (kindle version) was no different. While not a fable like his other books, this one might be his best one.

Lencioni tackles the topic of organizational health, which has huge implications for churches as well. He lays out 4 disciplines of healthy organizations: Build a cohesive leadership team, Create clarity, Over-communicate clarity, and Reinforce clarity.

Here’s a little description of each one:

Build a cohesive leadership team

An organization simply cannot be healthy if the people who are chartered with running it are not behaviorally cohesive in five fundamental ways. In any kind of organization, from a corporation to a department within that corporation, from a small, entrepreneurial company to a church or a school, dysfunction and lack of cohesion at the top inevitably lead to a lack of health throughout.

Create clarity

In addition to being behaviorally cohesive, the leadership team of a healthy organization must be intellectually aligned and committed to the same answers to six simple but critical questions. There can be no daylight between leaders around these fundamental issues.

Over-communicate clarity

Once a leadership team has established behavioral cohesion and created clarity around the answers to those questions, it must then communicate those answers to employees clearly, repeatedly, enthusiastically, and repeatedly (that’s not a typo). When it comes to reinforcing clarity, there is no such thing as too much communication.

Reinforce clarity

In order for an organization to remain healthy over time, its leaders must establish a few critical, non bureaucratic systems to reinforce clarity in every process that involves people. Every policy, every program, every activity should be designed to remind employees what is really most important.

Pretty simple, but something very few organizations achieve.

Here are a few things that jumped out in reading the book:

  • The health of an organization provides the context for strategy, finance, marketing, technology, and everything else that happens within it, which is why it is the single greatest factor determining an organization’s success. More than talent. More than knowledge. More than innovation.
  • Any organization that really wants to maximize its success must come to embody two basic qualities: it must be smart, and it must be healthy.
  • The vast majority of organizations today have more than enough intelligence, expertise, and knowledge to be successful. What they lack is organizational health.
  • The seminal difference between successful companies and mediocre or unsuccessful ones has little, if anything, to do with what they know or how smart they are; it has everything to do with how healthy they are.
  • A good way to look at organizational health – and one that executives seem to respond to readily – is to see it as the multiplier of intelligence.
  • If people don’t weight in, they can’t buy in.
  • Too many leaders seem to have a greater affinity for and loyalty to the department they lead rather than the team they’re a member of and the organization they are supposed to be collectively serving.
  • There is no getting around the fact that the only measure of a great team – or a great organization – is whether it accomplishes what it sets out to accomplish.
  • Within the context of making an organization healthy, alignment is about creating so much clarity that there is a little room as possible for confusion, disorder and infighting to set in.
  • Organizations learn by making decisions, even bad ones. By being decisive, leaders allow themselves to get clear, immediate data from their actions.
  • Successful, enduring organizations understand the fundamental reason they were founded and why they exist, and they stay true to that reason.
  • Every organization, if it wants to create a sense of alignment and focus, must have a single top priority within a given period of time.
  • Employees won’t believe what leaders are communicating to them until they’ve heard it seven times.
  • People are skeptical about what they’re being told unless they hear it consistently over time.
  • Great leaders see themselves as Chief Reminding Officer as much as anything else. Their top two priorities are to set the direction of the organization and then to ensure that people are reminded of it on a regular basis.
  • Messaging is not so much an intellectual process as an emotional one.
  • Bringing the right people into an organization, and keeping the wrong ones out, is as important as any activity that a leadership team must oversee.
  • When leaders fail to tell employees that they’re doing a great job, they might as well be taking money out of their pockets and throwing it into a fire, because they are wasting opportunities to give people the recognition they crave more than anything else.

Overall, this was one of the more helpful books I’ve, easily the best I’ve read on organizational health. Definitely one worth picking up if you are a leader.