A Simple Way to Connect New People to Your Church

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Every church hopes to have guests come to their church. In fact, many churches spend a lot of money on marketing, invite cards and a host of other things, just to get people to come to their church.

But what happens if they show up?

Too often, the next step isn’t obvious.

Most churches want people to connect to a group, a class or a team. Those are great next steps, but I think those are too big for most people.

At Revolution, our next step from a worship service is going to a newcomer’s lunch. A simple way to find out more information, get to know the leaders and other new people. Free food, free childcare and no commitment.

When I talk with pastors, they often talk about how they will do that when they think they have enough new people.

We’ve been doing newcomer’s lunches for over 3 years and would schedule them sporadically. Recently, we’ve made the move to have them each month: the 3rd Sunday of every month.

Whether you choose to do a dessert or a lunch, here are a few things to make them successful:

  1. Schedule them regularly. People should always be four weeks away from the next one at the most. That way if someone misses one, another is on its way. I actually had someone tell me they hadn’t gotten plugged in because they were waiting for our next lunch (this was when we did them quarterly). That was one reason we moved them to each month. Each week we say, “if you are new to Revolution and are not in a missional community or on a team, your next step is to come to a newcomer’s lunch.” There is no doubt what their step is.
  2. Choose a great host. There are people in your church with the gift of hospitality, who love to open their home and serve people that way. Let them use their gifts. We started by doing them at my house but found this was a way better option, that way the leaders can focus on the people while the hosts focus on the details.
  3. Have great food and childcare. Don’t skimp here. Whether you get it catered, have someone cook it or simply serve dessert, make it great. You are communicating value to your guests and newcomer’s. Childcare is important so the adults can hear what you want them to hear instead of having to hold their kids.
  4. Talk about yourself personally, not just the church. While people want to hear stories of the church, where it came from, beliefs, etc. they want to hear about you. The people who care about beliefs or the church’s story have already read them on the website. At this point, they are asking, “Do I like the pastor?” People tell me every month they are blown away that they get to meet our leaders and have lunch with them. This also helps if you are more of an introvert (like me) to sit in a smaller group and talk.
  5. Make sure new people meet other new people. We talked about doing away with the newcomer’s lunch and doing something right after the service, but felt like that would’ve been an information dump and would miss this crucial element: new people meeting other new people. They are all in the same boat, they are all checking out your church, they don’t know a lot of people and this helps to create natural community and friendships.
  6. Share their next step from the lunch. Have a clear and obvious next step from the lunch and help get them in it. Not everyone wants to, but for those that do, they should leave your lunch with the information they need to join a group or a team or whatever is next for them. If you miss this last step, you will still have people falling through the cracks.

Why Change Fails

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If you talk to any leader or pastor, they will tell you stories of changes, new ideas and initiatives failing. Even if, the new program would do better than the old program.

Churches are notorious for change failing.

Why quit having a class when no one comes? Because someone’s grandmother started that ministry 35 years ago. Why add drums or change how worship is done? Why bring in lights or projectors? Why should we change how we do discipleship since the way it is happening right now is not developing leaders or disciples? Because we’ve always done it this way. 

Going right along with this is a failure on the part of pastors and leaders to engage change well.

In his book Talk Like TED: The 9 Public-Speaking Secrets of the World’s Top Minds, Carmine Gallo makes this comment:

People don’t know what they want and, if they do, they have a hard time articulating what they truly desire.

The average person, when you ask them if they prefer A or B, they don’t know what they would prefer. They only know what they have experienced.

If your church only does Sunday School and you begin exploring small groups, people who have never experienced them will be resistant. Especially because pastors don’t know how to ask. They ask if “they would go to a home group?” “NO” is the resounding answer.

When a church begins exploring a second service, all people can think of is what they lose if the church goes to 2 services and how it will change their life and bring them a different experience.

Churches exploring multi-site and video preaching run into the same thing. People in your church only have one lens to look through, what they know and have experienced. 

A better way to change something is to ask:

  • Would you be open to trying a small group in a house?
  • Would you be open to going to an earlier service so we can open up seats for guests?
  • Would you be open to attending a church plant we send out?
  • Would you be open to trying a church with video preaching?

Now, when they say no and someone will, you are having a different conversation. Now you are talking about vision and buy in. Now you are talking about idols, resistance to change, what their fears are to new things. You also have an opportunity to help a person wrestle through what they don’t know and helping them see that they don’t know something. This is a great opportunity to shepherd someone into new things and help lead them.

Leaders, we need to learn how to ask better questions.

Four years into the life of Revolution Church we changed from meeting on Saturday nights in a church building to Sunday morning in a school. We had to raise $50,000 to go portable, set everything up and tear it all down and we changed days and times. There was some resistance. But we asked people if they would be open to trying it. Most everyone said they would try it. Same when we transitioned from semester small groups that met for 12 weeks to moving our church to being on mission in missional communities.

Leader, as you lead change, ask better questions to move your people and your church forward.

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