Tag Archives: leadership

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2018 Leadership Summit – 23 Leadership Quotes from Danielle Strickland

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Every year, my team and I attend the leadership summit. This year, there is a shadow hanging over the summit as I outlined here, but I’m still trusting that it will have some incredibly helpful content, just like in past years. To capture what I’m learning and to help you grow as a leader, I always share my notes from each session, so be sure to check back after each session and bookmark them for future use.

The final session of the first day featured a talk from Danielle Strickland who looked at men and women in the workplace (and church) and looked at the challenges associated with power dynamics in organizational culture. This is definitely a talk that my tribe in the church world could learn from. It was fun having my two oldest kids in this session with me and have some good discussions.

The following are some takeaways:

  1. In order for the truth to set us free, we must be disrupted because truth disrupts us.
  2. To make changes and change minds you must be able to imagine a better world and understand oppression.
  3. We all want a better story and that is what everyone is after.
  4. What makes the world flourish is men and women working together.
  5. Believe that it is possible for men and women to work together. 
  6. Women’s empowerment is a key to so many things improving in our world.
  7. Believing that it is possible is to refuse despair. It is to confront the hopelessness of inequality.
  8. Do not be afraid.
  9. 2/3 of women are not optimistic that gender equality can be achieved in the next 5 years.
  10. The enemy in relationships isn’t hate but fear. -Gandhi
  11. If our actions, decisions are fear based we will either be oppressed or be an oppressor. Fear is the currency of oppression.
  12. Difference through the lens of fear is a threat. Difference through the lens of faith it is an opportunity.
  13. Mutuality is crucial for men and women to work together. The enemies of mutuality are power and sex.
  14. Power is the ability to manipulate the course of events. 
  15. How we use our power is the measure of our leadership.
  16. A misuse of power is coercion and threats: Are you kind to those you lead? Do you treat them well? Can you accept change? Do you cut people off when they’re talking? Do you close yourself off to feedback? Do you show regard for people’s opinions or feelings?
  17. Isolation is a misuse of power. Trust and support is a good use of power.
  18. Minimizing is a misuse of power. Honesty and accountability is a good use of power.
  19. Male privilege is a misuse of power. Shared responsibility is a good use of power. Do you invite women into your decision making?
  20. Great leaders use power to empower other people. 
  21. If we’re willing to listen to voices we don’t normally listen to and are willing to learn from them, it will change how we live.
  22. Never give up on the dream of men and women working together. 
  23. Real empowerment and real freedom is a long walk in the same direction.
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2018 Leadership Summit – 10 Leadership Quotes from Danny Meyer

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Every year, my team and I attend the leadership summit. This year, there is a shadow hanging over the summit as I outlined here, but I’m still trusting that it will have some incredibly helpful content, just like in past years. To capture what I’m learning and to help you grow as a leader, I always share my notes from each session, so be sure to check back after each session and bookmark them for future use.

The third session featured a talk by Danny Meyer, Restaurateur; TIME Magazine’s “100 Most Influential People.” His talk focused on creating a customer-focused culture, which churches can always grow in.

The following are some takeaways:

  1. There’s nothing worse than wasting your life on something you don’t want to do.
  2. The road to success is paved with mistakes well handled.
  3. To get anywhere worthwhile is to listen to the people on the front lines.
  4. The places with the best service will last the longest.
  5. Service means doing what you said you would do.
  6. Hospitality is how you make someone feel while delivering service.
  7. The shelf life of innovation is 2 minutes.
  8. Companies thrive by doing the thoughtful things. Thoughtful is thinking and feeling.
  9. If we know how to make you feel better than the next guy, you’ll come back.
  10. Once a mistake is made, you can’t erase it. The only thing you can do is write a great next chapter.
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2018 Leadership Summit – 16 Leadership Quotes from Angela Ahrendts

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Every year, my team and I attend the leadership summit. To capture what I’m learning and to help you grow as a leader, I always share my notes from each session, so be sure to check back after each session and bookmark them for future use.

The first session featured a talk from Angela Ahrendts, who is the Senior V.P. of Retail for Apple. Her talk focused on how empathy is an essential quality for leadership.

The following are some takeaways:

  1. Values are the foundation of everything you are.
  2. Core values that are our strengths make us valuable to others.
  3. The higher you go as a leader, the more important it is to connect and over communicate.
  4. A leader needs to walk slowly through the crowd.
  5. A morning routine is incredibly important in the life of a leader.
  6. In hiring, look for a we kind of person instead of a me kind of person.
  7. It’s not about hiring great individuals but how they fit into the team.
  8. Brands are bigger than cultures.
  9. Simple things about branding: know why you’re doing it (the deeper purpose behind something), that why needs to become a core value of the company.
  10. Every team and organization should always know if they are doing what they set out to do.
  11. Motivating people: to move people you have to be able to understand them.
  12. You can teach people anything but you can’t teach people to care.
  13. Leaders need to focus on what people feel from them.
  14. Look people in the eye.
  15. Talk to people. Celebrate people. Thank people.
  16. Ask: what would I want people to say to me?
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2018 Leadership Summit – 32 Leadership Quotes from Craig Groeschel

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Every year, my team and I attend the leadership summit. This year, there is a shadow hanging over the summit as I outlined here, but I’m still trusting that it will have some incredibly helpful content, just like in past years. To capture what I’m learning and to help you grow as a leader, I always share my notes from each session, so be sure to check back after each session and bookmark them for future use.

The first session featured a talk from Craig Groeschel. He is the Senior Pastor of Life.Church and the author of many books. His session was on what it looks like to be a leader that people love to follow.

The following are some takeaways:

  1. When the leader gets better, everyone gets better.
  2. Leadership is never about title and position, it is about trust and influence.
  3. Leaders are given great power and must wield that for the good of others.
  4. Leaders can make excuses or make a difference, but they can’t make both.
  5. A humble leader can learn from anybody.
  6. The two areas a leader needs to grow in is leadership (where are you taking me) and emotional intelligence (how are you treating me).
  7. There’s a difference between a leader who is popular and one who is respected.
  8. You will never be respected if you are only trying to be respected.
  9. The 3 feelings you will have under great and trusted leadership: you feel valued, inspired, and empowered.
  10. Leaders need a heart to care.
  11. You will never be a leader that people love to follow if you don’t love people.
  12. An essential part of being a leader is I notice, You matter.
  13. Appreciate more than you think you should. Then double it.
  14. Leaders need a passion to inspire. 
  15. There is a difference between inspiration and motivation.
  16. Motivation is about pushing people to do something they don’t want to do.
  17. Inspiring is pulling out of them what is already inside of them.
  18. Inspired employees are twice as productive as employees who call themselves satisfied.
  19. Following through is inspiring.
  20. The most important quality is a centered leader. A centered leader is secure, stable, confident, not easily distracted or swayed, fully engaged.
  21. A centered leader is guided by values, driven by purpose.
  22. All you need as a leader to inspire people is 1 or 2 developed strengths.
  23. Leaders need a willingness to empower.
  24. The best leaders unleash higher performance through empowerment, not command and control.
  25. You can have control or growth, but you can’t have both.
  26. If you delegate tasks, you’re creating followers. If we delegate authority, we are creating leaders.
  27. We do this as leaders by making the decisions that only we can make.
  28. The fewer decisions you are making, the better you are as a leader.
  29. The strength of an organization is reflected by how deep into it people have the ability to say yes.
  30. The best way to find out if you trust someone is to trust them.
  31. If you don’t trust your team, you are either too controlling or you have the wrong people.
  32. Leaders need the courage to be real, vulnerable, stand up with humility and take risks even when you’re scared. 
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Bill Hybels, Leadership and Finishing Well

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I’ve debated whether or not to say anything about Bill Hybels and Willow Creek, but the more I thought about it, the more I felt like sharing what is running through my head and heart, and some thoughts for leaders. Others have written a lot on what happened, why it happened and what Willow should do. I’ll do some of that, but talk about my perspective.

For context, I interned with the WCA in the summer of 2001. It was one of the highlights of my life (one reason is I got engaged that summer). I had a 2-hour commute each day, and Willow had an audio library you could check out talks and sermons. I was wading into the waters of church planting and leadership at the time, so during that summer I listened to every Leadership Summit talk I could and many sermons by Hybels and John Ortberg to learn from them.

I was a sponge that summer.

When I first started reading the reports and accusations about Hybels this spring, my heart sunk.

I’ve never met Bill Hybels, but from a distance, he had an enormous impact on me. His passion for the church, evangelism, was convicting to me as a young leader. All those came to the surface even more on Sunday when the NY Times article came out.

First, I’m sad. I can’t imagine the pain and heartache all those women have walked through as they have bravely stepped forward to share their story. Is their evidence it is all true? I don’t know, but it seems overwhelming that it is. As a pastor, I’ve sat across from enough victims to see the devastation they are walking through and have walked through. I also can’t imagine what Bill Hybels family is walking through at this moment. It is easy for us to forget the family and those around someone like Bill Hybels at this moment. They didn’t choose this. They weren’t a part of this and yet, they will feel the ripple effects of the choices of one man and those choices will be etched into everyone’s lives forever. It’s sad when you think about the influence Willow Creek has had and how that tarnishes Jesus in our culture and world. Yes, I know and believe that all things are being redeemed and are redeemable, but this is the reality for these families and this church. Granted, as others have pointed out, the church has not made wise choices during this situation.

Second, I’m angry and confused by it all. There is something that happens when someone you’ve looked up to (whether close up or from a distance) and that person loses their ministry and influence. When I read the NY Times article on Sunday, I was angry. It hit me a lot harder than I expected. I shared this with a friend, and he said, “That’s because you’re human and not a robot.” I’ve watched friends, inside and outside of the church, wreck their lives by the decisions they made. At first, I’m angry because I think, “how could you do that?” But then I look at my heart and know I could do it (and so could you). We are always one choice away from wrecking our lives.

Third, I’ve been asked if I’m still going to the summit this week. The answer is yes. I debated it. The reality is, it is still connected to Hybels, his shadow is enormous. I’m going to show up early to watch their announcement (although I wish they did it at the start instead of 15 minutes before the event starts) and I’m going to be praying they are courageous leaders at a leadership summit and do what is right. I also think that those who are speaking have a lot of wisdom to share and have a unique opportunity this week to cast a vision for the church with this hanging over the summit. We are, in many ways, watching a leadership case study unfold.

Now, for pastors and leaders.

Situations like this are opportunities to make us sit back to ask questions.

In his book Impact: Great Leadership Changes Everything by Tim Irwin, he says there are five steps to wrecking your life, or as he would say derailing your life. They are:

  1. Lack of self-awareness. When a person doesn’t know what could bring them down, they don’t know what their weaknesses are. Is it money, greed, power, sex, lust, a bigger house or car? What are they willing to trade their marriage, reputation, kids or future in for? If you don’t know that, you will be brought down.
  2. Arrogance or misguided confidence. when a person sees someone wreck their life and says, “That could never happen to me.” This is when a person sins once and says, “I already did it once, what is one more time?” They have supreme confidence they can stop whenever or take back control whenever they choose, or, that it won’t destroy their life.
  3. Missed warning signals. This might be close calls in getting caught, being late to work for staying up too late, conviction from the Holy Spirit that you push away or even evidence that you might get caught.
  4. Rationalization. This is when you start to say things like, “I deserve this.” Or, “This is my only vice.” Or, you blame someone else for your situation. “If my spouse was more attentive.” Or, “If I had a little more money we could get ahead.” Or, “My kids will understand when their older why I had to work as I did.”
  5. Derailment. Eventually, with enough time, enough rationalizations, you hit the wall and derail your life.
5 things we can learn from Willow Creek and Bill Hybels.

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As Irwin says, there are early warning signs. Those early warning signs show up early in our lives. They show up in our family of origin. I think leaders do themselves a disservice if they don’t dive into their stories. Understanding where they’ve come from, what is in their past, what has already gone before them, etc. Every leader should know what the thing that can bring them down is and how to guard against that.

I think in many ways, church leaders are at an important crossroads. We are becoming what many in our culture figured we were. For me, this has caused me to think anew about my boundaries, broken places I need to confess, digging into real friendships that will breathe life into me and hold me accountable. It has renewed a passion for finishing the call God has placed on my life. I hope that situations like this do the same for other leaders. So much is at stake, in our lives as leaders, our families, but for those, we lead and interact with.

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The #1 Reason People Leave Your Church (And Love Your Church)

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People leave churches for all kinds of reasons.

They might move, their kids get older, their schedules change, the church moves to locations.

They also leave for theological reasons. Maybe a new pastor has a different bent on an important theological point. They may have changed the version of the Bible they preach from (not kidding on that one).

The preaching may have changed and it no longer feels as deep as it used to or now it’s too deep and isn’t focused on application like it used to be.

Some of the reasons are good and normal, some make pastors scratch their heads and wonder what happened.

What I’ve learned (and I don’t have a study on this), but I think the number one reason people leave your church is…

Your strategy.

Another way to put it: how you do church. 

The #1 reason people leave your church.

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Think about it.

Almost every church holds up Acts 2 as the model they are going after.

Almost every church and Christian would agree that we are to live out the great commission (making disciples) and the great commandment (loving God and others).

But how?

That’s strategy. That’s how you do church (for lack of a better word).

Your strategy is how you as a church uniquely live these things out.

Do you have small groups, classes, missional communities, men’s ministry, women’s ministry, a combination of these? That’s strategy, but they all get at how you disciple and connect people to each other.

What about kids and students? When do they meet? Do they serve? Attend the service? Are they off on their own? What role do they play in community groups?

All strategy.

How about preaching and music? Do you go line by line through a book of the Bible, jump around, preach topically? What kind of music or liturgy do you use? How often do you do communion?

All strategy.

Make no mistake pastor or church leader, when someone walks up to you on a Sunday morning and says, “We’re leaving”, if you press long enough, it will be the strategy, almost every time.

Now, this isn’t bad at all.

In fact, when this happens this should tell you that your strategy and culture are real and clear.

As well, this is also why people come to your church.

The #1 reason people come to your church.

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They often don’t know it, but your strategy is not only why they stay, but also why they come.

Why?

Because your strategy comes through everywhere. Your strategy on being simple, programmatic, attractional, missional or all 4, attracts them and others.

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Links for Leaders 4/6/18

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It’s the weekend…finally. Today is a special day as it is mine and Katie’s 16th anniversary! So that’s fun. We’re working on a post about some of the things we wished we would’ve known when we got married, so stay tuned for that.

We’re spending it with our 5 kids traveling to Pennsylvania for my grandmother’s memorial service. So we’d appreciate your prayers for that (and the people who have to sit next to us on the plane).

And since it’s the weekend, it’s the perfect time to catch up on some reading. Below, you’ll find some articles I came across this week that I found helpful as a leader and parent and hope you do as well.

Before diving into those, in case you missed them this week. Here are the top 3 posts on my blog this week that I hope you find helpful:

Here are the posts I enjoyed:

It is easy to get tired as a leader or get stale, but staying fresh is important as a leader. Scott Cochrane shares 3 ideas to stay fresh and why it matters.

If you speak every week (or almost every week), understanding your audience is crucial.

Focus as a leader is crucial to success, but also incredibly difficult to have. Here are 8 ways to focus instead of multi-task as a leader. 

Inspiring people as a leader and a speaker is crucial and Kurt Bubna shares the secret to that.

Growth is crucial for a leader and a church or business and everyone desires growth, but many times we run into invisible barriers without realizing it. Here are 7 big barriers to church growth.

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Recovering from the Leadership Sprint

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You’ll often hear older leaders say to younger leaders, “Don’t go so fast, leadership is a marathon, not a sprint.”

Leadership is a marathon, not a sprint.

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There’s a lot of truth to this.

Many leaders, myself included, struggle to see what God can do over a lifetime of faithfulness and get so focused on the next thing, the next challenge, product, series, event.

Some seasons are busy. Breakneck speed busy.

Too many leaders (and families for that matter) move from one of those seasons to the next.

Without pausing.

How to pause in leadership.

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But how do you pause?

I think the key to longevity is the breaks in between the busy times. Should we be busy? Yes, but not overloaded.

Should we be busy? Yes, but not overloaded.

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Here are a few ideas to keep in mind to recover from the sprint of leadership and life:

1. Admit you’re in a busy season. There seem to be two ideas about busy seasons: relish them and talk about how busy you are. Feel overwhelmed by it and play the victim. Yes, there are other ideas, but these two seem to be the most common.

Being busy is okay.

Say, “we’re busy.” You planned it or at least didn’t prevent it.

It’s okay because it won’t always be this way, but it is right now.

You also need to be aware of when your busy seasons happen. If you’re like most people and most jobs, you have a time of year that will naturally be busier than another.

2. Engage fully in that season. It can be tempting to throw in the towel during the busy season, during the leadership sprint. You might need to, and you need to be honest about that.

If you can stick it out, engage fully, throw everything you have at what you’re doing.

3. Plan a break. The mistake most leaders and people in our culture make is not the busy times, but what happens after them.

Take a look at your calendar and determine that you will stop at the end of this sprint and stop. I think leaders need to put breaks, time off, hours, days off on their calendar as much as other appointments.

4. Be intentional about that break. It’s not enough to plan a break; you have to take it and be intentional about it. Failure to do this is why our culture jokes about needed a vacation after a vacation.

What things can you do that will recharge you? Refresh you? What activities should you do or not do?

These are essential practices to put into place.

Doing these will not only help you to maximize the sprints in your life but also make sure you don’t get overwhelmed by them.

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Stretching Yourself to Reach a Really Hard Goal

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You know the drill.

You set a goal. A really big one. One that will stretch you, challenge you. It’s hard.

Really hard.

When we stretch ourselves, often we believe that we will succeed. We see a goal: losing weight, a promotion, saving money, starting a business or a church, and we think, “I can do this.”

Maybe you can.

Maybe you can’t.

What do you do with failure?

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The problem in leadership circles is that when we talk about stretching ourselves, we simply focus on the people who stretched themselves, climbed the mountain and planted their flag. We don’t focus on the people all along the way who quit, got eaten up and spit out, weren’t as successful or simply didn’t make it.

I don’t know if it is wishful thinking, thinking it won’t happen to us, but many of us talk ourselves into believing we’ll be the one who makes it.

I remember right after we planted our church, I was at a conference and the speaker said, “God’s will for your life might be that you plant a church and it fails.”

God’s will for your life might be that you plant a church and it fails.

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I thought, “He’s clearly talking to the guy next to me, because that won’t happen.”

But what if it did?

There have been seasons, dark ones, that God has brought us through.

What if the best thing for you is to fail?

That isn’t very encouraging, but our response to failure is often what propels us forward to the next thing.

Recently, I read The Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact, and the authors said:

The promise of stretching is not success, it’s learning. It’s self-insight. It’s the promise of gleaning the answers to some of the most important and vexing questions of our lives: What do we want? What can we do? Who can we be? What can we endure?

Two very hard seasons of ministry led us to Tucson to plant a church, and those two years and God’s faithfulness through them is what kept us going many hard days.

If you are a leader, this has enormous implications on your life.

Your experiences aren’t wasted experiences. Your moments of failures, especially when you were so sure, are meant for something.

I often want to protect people I lead from failure. I want to step in and tell a younger leader, “I don’t think that’s a good idea” or, “You won’t make it.” But not anymore. It’s important for them to walk that road and for me to be there to help as I can.

As a parent, you can’t protect your kids from hard experiences. You aren’t necessarily meant to.

Stretching yourself is part of the journey, part of the learning. Part of what eventually helps you make an impact.

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Links for Leaders 2/23/18

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It’s the weekend…finally. The perfect time to grab a cup of coffee and catch up on some reading. Below, you’ll find some articles I came across this week that I found helpful as a leader and parent and hope you do as well.

Before diving into those, in case you missed them this week. Here are the top 3 posts on my blog this week that I hope you find helpful:

I just wrapped up a relationship series at our church called Him & Her and so I’m writing some new related content around the series: The Key to Healthy Relationships, The Power of Sexuality and Our Longing for Intimacy in Relationships, 3 Things that Make a Great Marriage and How to Love Those Who Mean the Most to You.

I love this article about Ray Ortlund and his ministry. It was deeply encouraging to me. To see how I don’t have to be great in my 30’s or do anything incredible for Jesus, but can have the greatest decade in my 60’s and 70’s. I also love that he planted a church at 58 since so many people in their 30’s feel like they missed out on something. For those who feel like life has passed you by, this is an encouraging read.

Carey Nieuwhof shares what will drive church growth in the future. There are a ton of great insights here.

If you’re like me, you love new ways of communicating, marketing, etc. In doing that though, it is easy to miss those old things still work. Rich Birch shares 4 old school communication methods that churches should use. We use some of these but will start using more of these as well.

Most leadership blogs and books on what leaders do. Brian Dodd shares great insight about the 8 things great leaders know.