Photo by Prateek Katyal on Unsplash

Picture this: You just got a job at a church. You have decided to leave your last ministry, gone through the interview process, sold your house, packed up, and moved your family. You are excited and a little scared, but ready to go.

What do you do first?

Your first steps determine how your ministry goes at that church. The phrase “you only get one shot at a first impression” comes to mind. And that first impression will become a lasting impression.

Often, pastors come to a new church thinking they have all the answers. After all, they got the job and must be the answer person. In many ways, the church does look to the pastor for the answers, to know the vision and where the church is going.

The problem for new pastors is that they don’t know what they don’t know.

The problem for new pastors is that they don’t know what they don’t know.
Click To Tweet

One of the things I did in my first six months at CCC was interview almost 50 people. I met with people who had been at the church for decades and ones who had started in the last six months. I talked with people who were long-time Christians, some new Christians, and a few exploring the faith.

My goal was to learn as much as possible about the church from those in it.

I asked them the same 8 questions:

• What is going well at Community Covenant Church?
• What is not going well at CCC?
• What is one thing about CCC you hope doesn’t change?
• What is one thing about CCC you hope will change?
• What burning questions would you like to ask me?
• If money weren’t an issue, what would be your next full-time hire(s) and why?
• If you were in my shoes, what would you focus on first?
• How can I pray for you?

As I listened, I started to get a sense of the story of the people in CCC and the story of CCC from the perspective of the people who lived it. 

How to start a brand new ministry on the right foot.
Click To Tweet

When you talk with a search firm that is leading a job search, you hear what they want you to hear. It isn’t wrong or false, but it is often incomplete. Because the search firm doesn’t live in the area or attend the church week in and week out. 

Additionally, when a new pastor comes, he will often want to change the church’s mission, vision, and strategy. Sometimes, this needs to be done quickly; other times, it might be best to wait. As I listened to people’s answers, I started to get a sense of what God had not only done in the life and history of CCC, but also what God might be calling us into next. I was able to start saying back to the staff, elders, and leaders, “This is what I hear people saying, does that sound right to you?”

Too often, we take our vision from what another church did or the last thing we heard in a podcast. That can be a good thing, but I think there is something unique that God wants to do in and through a particular church. That is why He has brought together that group of people in that place at this time. 

I think there is something unique that God wants to do in and through a particular church. That is why He has brought together that group of people, in that place at this time.
Click To Tweet

The job of the leaders is to come together with the people to discern that. 

What was amazing to me was how many answers were the same in terms of how people answered these questions. 

The post Starting Strong at a New Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Windows on Unsplash

Every week, I talk to someone who is overwhelmed, tired and/or exhausted. 

As a parent of teenagers, I feel this. 

I was talking with some pastors the other day, and the topics of burnout, being too busy, and doing too much came up. This is a common thread among people, no matter what they do.

Here are some of the things they asked:

• How do you know if you are close?
• Are there warning signs that you are getting too busy?
• How do you know that your busyness is not just a season but becoming a way of life? We always just say it’s a season, and soon, we will slow down.

I know there are warning signs in my life when I am doing too much or taking on too much. Sometimes, I adhere to them and make changes, but other times, I bulldoze through and pay the price.

Here are some warning signs to be aware of:

8 signs you need to slow down.
Click To Tweet

What usually is easy is now challenging. This is one of the first things that happens.

It centers on preaching, sermon prep, and reading leadership books. Whenever I feel unmotivated in one or all of these areas, I know I am past the point of running too fast. To combat this, I take periodic breaks from preaching (I try not to preach more than 6-8 weeks in a row), and I work on books that have nothing to do with sermon prep or church ministry to give my brain a break.

I am usually very decisive, but I know something is off when I have difficulty deciding what to eat or watch on Netflix. 

Sleep is hard to come by. For many Americans, sleep is challenging and something we do less and less.

We go to bed too late, we don’t take enough naps, we spend too much time on technology, and get worked up. I try to get to bed by 10:30; I do my best not to look at social media after 8 pm so that my brain can take a break. This is especially important as it relates to work email and the news. Studies show how smartphone use after 9 pm can harm sleep and productivity. If you must take sleeping pills, watch TV to fall asleep, or find yourself going to bed at midnight or staring at the clock at midnight, you need to work on your sleep.

It is hard to get going in the morning. Some people are morning people and can’t wait to get going; others are not. I’m not a morning person. But, when I find myself having a hard time getting going in the morning, needing multiple cups of coffee to stay awake or to focus, that’s a warning sign. Think about this morning; how hard was it to get out of bed? The harder it was, the closer you were to burning out.

Motivation is hard to come by. You are indeed more motivated and alert at specific times of the day. For me, it is the first thing in the morning, so I reserve that for sermon prep and not meetings. It is when I am most creative and need to give that mental time to the most critical part of my job: preaching. When I find that motivation is not there, I know I have a problem.

You get angry fast. When you are tired, you tend to get angry fast. Your fuse is shorter with those closest to you: family, friends, and coworkers.

You use things to calm down. When we use something to calm you down, help you relax, help you sleep, or “take the edge off,” we have a problem. If you think, “I just need ____ to calm down or feel better,” that is a warning sign.  

You don’t laugh as much or have fun. This is connected to what we’ve already said, but if you can’t remember the last time you laughed and had fun, that’s a problem. When you are tired, the last thing you have energy for is fun or community.

You have pulled back from community. When you are tired, especially as an introvert, the last thing you want is to be around people. Ironically, one of the things that can be the most helpful to ward off burnout and help you break unhealthy patterns is community, being around people who care about you.

8 warning signs that you are too busy.
Click To Tweet

The post Are you Too Busy? appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Kevin Gonzalez on Unsplash

If you get a group of Christians together and ask them what the Bible teaches about sex or what they think about sex, you will probably get predictable answers. Some won’t know what the Bible teaches. Others will talk about the restrictions the Bible has about sex. 

Many Christians speak about sex in very hushed tones, guarded or even embarrassed about it if they speak about it at all. Many churches act like it is a topic they won’t talk about unless it is homosexuality. 

Before preaching on the Song of Songs at my church, when I told people we were preaching through it, I got looks of surprise. Several had no idea what was in it. Often, Christians want to make it a metaphor for Christ and the church, and while that is part of what the Song of Songs teaches us, it teaches us so much more. 

And I think it is one of the most relevant books in the Bible because so many people in the church and outside of the church are confused when it comes to sexuality and what the Bible actually teaches. 

What should Christians think about sex?
Click To Tweet

I looked at a popular pastor’s website out of curiosity. This pastor preaches through books of the Bible. In his ministry career, he has preached through every book except one.

The Song of Songs.

Why?

The Song of Songs is just as inspired as the book of Romans!

The Song of Songs is just as inspired as the book of Romans.
Click To Tweet

By and large, Christians don’t know how to enjoy sex in the way God created it.

We know how to corrupt it, we know how the culture thinks about it, and so we either run the other direction (don’t enjoy it, don’t explore with your spouse, never talk about it with your kids) or we simply give in to the culture and live like them (adultery, sleeping around, porn, selfishness, sex as a weapon.)

Neither one of those is a good option or even a biblical one.

The Song of Songs shows us what marriage is supposed to be like. Spouses who adore each other, pursue each other, serve each other, seek to please and pleasure each other, all for the good of their marriage. Spouses who complement each other and know what the other likes and dislikes and then use that information to make the other happy.

Our culture, from broken homes, divorce, adultery, and porn, has no idea what sex is supposed to be like. Sex is seen as a weapon to get your way, so women wield it with power in their relationships. Many wives operate from the perspective of: I’ll give you my body, but only as I manipulate you to do what I want.

One of the other struggles our culture has is that our sexual identity has become the trump card and the most important thing about who we are. That is not what the Bible teaches, and when we make that the trump card, we limit ourselves to simply who we are sexually and what we do sexually. We then have a broken image of ourselves and see our value only through the lens of sex. This isn’t surprising when we think about how prevalent porn is.

Your sexual identity is not the most important thing about you.
Click To Tweet

The Bible, particularly the Song of Songs, shows us that sex within marriage is not only to be celebrated, enjoyed, and gratifying, but it is also an act of worship to God.

The reason Christians often take the stance they do on sex within marriage (seeing it as dirty, a chore, or prudish about it) is that it is the easy stance to take. To have a healthy view of sexuality will often mean dealing with past addictions, past hurts, past abuse, and body image issues, and all of those are in places we push down, pretend are not there, and try to move forward from without dealing with them.

Sex, intimacy, and affection are the barometer of your marriage.

Sex, intimacy, and affection are the barometer of your marriage.
Click To Tweet

If you want to know the health of your marriage, where you are in dealing with past hurts, and how you and your spouse are pursuing each other, simply look at your view of sexuality and intimacy: how intimate you are (sharing your hurts, dreams, joys, and secrets; how open you are), and your affection. I would add how often you are connecting sexually, but that is very nuanced as it relates to the season of life, parenting, and health issues. But if you find yourself pulling away from your spouse for any reason, those are things to pay attention to. 

If you pay attention to those things, you will probably know everything you need to know about the health of your marriage.

Why you should preach through the Song of Songs.
Click To Tweet

After spending the last 9 weeks walking through the Song of Songs, I can tell you it is a worthwhile series to do at your church. 

The number of conversations I have had with people young and old, dating, married, single, divorced, and widowed, has been incredible. As you look at what you think of sex, dating, intimacy, and relationships, you uncover a lot that you grew up believing, things your family of origin shaped, and some things you need the cross to reshape and redeem. 

It is a risky series to do. 

I often talk to pastors afraid to step into it because they don’t want to alienate someone in their church. This is a real thing, and it takes a lot of effort to speak to everyone when you are talking about relationships. 

But I also think the reason many pastors don’t preach through this book is that they haven’t navigated the things that will come up in the series in their own marriages. Preaching through the Song of Songs places a massive mirror on the pastor’s life and marriage, which is good and scary at the same time.

The post Lessons After Preaching Through the Song of Songs appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Luis Villasmil on Unsplash

I heard at a conference recently that 2 out of 5 pastors are thinking about quitting ministry.

Many people attending church may be surprised, but pastors know this reality. 

Pastors regularly wake up after a hard day or season of ministry and wonder what life would be like in a different job. This isn’t just pastors, as I’m sure anyone reading this has thought about quitting their job and trying something different. 

But why do pastors feel this?

Pastors know this.

Many people in their churches do not.

There are a few reasons why pastors think about quitting:

1. Ministry is hard work. Every job is hard. Whether you are a pastor, an electrician, an engineer, or a barista. Life and work is hard. Ministry is no different. You can’t be naive about this. Too many pastors have rose-colored glasses about putting out a church sign and just expecting people to show up, and the people who show up will be bought in, not messy and without difficulty.

I think one of the things that pastors need to learn how to navigate is not only the physical, mental, and emotional side of their role (as all jobs do) but also the spiritual side (especially the warfare they and their families will experience) and moments of grief and loss. These are the things that set ministry apart. 

Handling your energy is a stewardship issue.
Click To Tweet

2. They aren’t sleeping or eating well. There is a direct connection between how you eat, how you sleep, and the level of energy you have. Handling your energy is a stewardship issue. Leaders have a lot of meetings over meals and drink a lot of coffee or energy drinks. They stay up too late watching TV, surfing social media instead of sleeping, taking a sabbath, or doing something recharging and refreshing.

There is a direct connection between how you eat, how you sleep & your energy level.
Click To Tweet

This becomes even more of an issue the older you get. Now that I’m in my 40s, I don’t have the same energy levels I had in my 20s. But many leaders try to lead and live like they are half their age. 

We often quote the verse about how our bodies are a temple, which means our bodies are meant for stewardship and worship. How we treat them is a direct reflection of our worship. So what we put into them and put them through is connected to our worship.

3. They don’t have an outlet. Whenever I get tired, it is often because I am not taking my retreat day, hanging out with friends, or doing fun things. Leaders and pastors are notorious for being bad friends and struggling to have hobbies and do fun things. You will start to think about quitting, not being thankful, begrudgingly going to meetings or counseling people. Get outside, take a break, slow down.

When was the last time you took a break and had fun?
Click To Tweet

4. Tensions. Tensions are a part of life because tensions are a part of every relationship. Tensions in life aren’t necessarily a bad thing. Andy Stanley says,”Tensions show us things we need to pay attention to.” In the last few years, those tensions have increased in our culture, and I think everyone feels it. Some of the tensions in our culture are around sexual identity, politics, or race. Those tensions can find their way into churches. Still, you add a lot of tensions around community and relationships, conflict, finances, theology, and the shifting sands of culture. Pastors also have tensions in life; they navigate as they parent, age, and deal with aging parents. Part of the role of pastors is carrying tensions others carry, whether that is healthy or not. Pastors often feel like they are running ragged because of this.

Pastor, you must learn how to navigate the tensions in your life and let go of them.
Click To Tweet

5. Not leading from a place of burden. Leaders are idea machines. We read books, go to conferences, listen to podcasts, and look for the latest trend, but those are ideas, not a vision. It is easy to confuse the two.

A vision is what drives you and comes from a burden. Any leader, if you want to know their vision, ask about their burden. You must keep that in the forefront. I wake up and want to lead and build an irresistible church to our next-door neighbors and the next generation. This burden is ingrained in experiences growing up and watching churches fail to reach this demographic, especially men.

Vision is not an idea, it is a burden.
Click To Tweet

Many pastors begin out of a place of burden when they start. But then life and ministry just seem to happen. They take some hits, have some failures, and slowly, that burden disappears. 

You must continually remind yourself of this burden. You must put yourself in places where this fire is rekindled. 

Whatever it takes!

6. Not dealing with emotions. I was unprepared for how emotionally tiring ministry and leadership can be. It can be hard to walk with people who get a divorce, get fired, wreck their lives, funerals, and miscarriages. This can wreck your heart. You must learn to deal with the emotional ride of pastoring. If you don’t, you will become a statistic.

6 reasons pastors think about quitting.
Click To Tweet

Part of this journey for pastors is learning to acknowledge their journeys with a trusted friend or counselor. Too often, as leaders, we try to be strong and think we are doing our team, spouse, and church a favor. Sometimes, this is true, which makes leadership so tricky. There has to come a moment when you can let go of someone. Share precisely where you are, what you need, and what you are carrying. 

The post 6 Reasons Pastors Quit (And What To Do about It) appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by whoislimos on Unsplash

The reality of evil and suffering is one that a lot of people have argued about and questioned God on, and it is one of the main roadblocks to trusting God and following him.

In my years as a pastor, I’ve sat with couples who have buried a child, adults burying their parents, and wept with people who just found out they had cancer and a short time to live. I have listened to the brokenhearted stories about the end of a marriage, a child who wants nothing to do with the family or God, the loss of jobs, financial difficulties and addictions that can’t be beaten.

It’s heartbreaking, and those are just the ones I’ve been party to. This doesn’t even count the national and international tragedies and natural disasters we see every day on the news and on social media.

What to do when the storms of life beat you down.
Click To Tweet

I’ve walked through the loss of friends, difficulty in family and work relationships, loss of jobs, setbacks in life, and challenges in starting our church. I’ve walked through the joys and difficulties of moving a family across the country, pastoring a hurting church while watching it grow and reach new people, and walking through the pain of having people leave. I’ve looked at mountains in my own life that seemed impossible to get past, hurt that felt so painful I thought I could never recover, betrayal that ran deep.

And then sits Romans 8:28 – 30. One of the most quoted verses in the Bible is Romans 8:28 – 30. It has been used for encouragement over and over in the lives of thousands since Paul wrote it.

It says: And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

Right now, you might be in the midst of a storm in life. You might not be. If you aren’t, the reality is your storm is coming at some point.

Here are a few questions to help you see where you are, where God is in the storm you are, and how to have the faith to walk through what you are in and what is ahead:

4 questions to help you trust God when life feels out of your control.
Click To Tweet

What storm are you facing? It is crucial to identify the storm you are facing. Often, we don’t know what it is. We simply feel down, or something feels off from what used to be or what we hope. Sometimes, it isn’t a storm we’re in the middle of; we’re simply tired or burned out. Other times, we are in the dark place of the storm, and the waves are crashing around us. Also, without identifying our storm, we will struggle to see anything God is doing because we’ll simply go into survival mode or become jaded.

Identifying a storm is a key to getting through the storm.
Click To Tweet

Are there any sins that need to be confronted? By this I mean, have you sinned to get you into the place you are in, or has someone else? Take finances for an example. This can cause an incredibly stressful storm, but many of our financial issues (housing market, retirement, etc.) are out of our control. Other financial storms are in our control (debt, spending, saving, giving, etc.). Or relational storms: did you hurt someone? Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? Is there someone you need to confront or forgive and let go of?

Look back at a storm, hurt, or pain from your past. With some distance from that situation, can you see God’s hand? I know that the further I am from a situation, the more clarity I have. I will often see my pride and sin more clearly, but I also see God’s hand more clearly. The reality is that on this side of heaven, we will not have answers for everything that happens to us. We aren’t promised that. We are promised that God will never leave or forsake us, that all things serve a purpose in God’s plan, and that all things will bring about God’s glory and our good if we are called by him and love him.

Sometimes you must look back to go forward.
Click To Tweet

What does looking at your past help you to see about God with what you are facing? What is he trying to do right now? I like to look back on my life because it often helps me move forward. This is why God had the nation of Israel do things to remember how he moved in the past. This is why, as followers of Jesus, we do things like communion and baptism to remember how God worked in the past, which enormously impacts our faith in the future.

4 ways to handle when ministry gets hard.
Click To Tweet

The post What to do When Life Beats You Down appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Randy Tarampi on Unsplash

Recently, I had several (separate) conversations with guys my age where I talked about some of the dreams Katie and I have and some of the prayers we are praying about our future. As our kids continue to grow, we are asking God how to launch them best, what pastoral ministry as empty nesters look like, and for him to give us clarity about pastoral ministry in our 50s and beyond.

Why?

So much life is ahead of us; we don’t want to miss all God has for us. What you do today and your decisions impact where you are in a decade or two.

When I shared this, they responded, “I can’t remember the last time I dreamed.”

It is easy to dream in your teens and 20s but harder in your 40s and 50s.
Click To Tweet

It makes sense. Life is busy and hard as we age. Cynicism starts to creep in, and we begin to think, “This is all there is.” 

I talk to many people in midlife who feel stuck or like their life has grown stale. Some of it is because of past decisions, but we often stop believing that God has things for us in the future. We start to think our best days are behind us. 

Why do we feel this way? Many of us are tired. We have less energy as we age, and it is hard to push ourselves. We have tried many things that didn’t work or go as planned, so there is a sense that we shouldn’t get our hopes up. 

Too often, though, people in midlife quit things. They quit relationships, marriages, careers, or faith because of their lack of direction, growing frustrations, or something else they can’t name. 

What if you took an afternoon and dreamed? What if you asked your spouse if all our prayers got answered, what would life look like in five years? Ten or twenty years from now? 

What if you asked your spouse if all our prayers got answered, what does life look like in 5 years? 10 or 20 years from now?
Click To Tweet

As I write this, our youngest will be twelve this summer. In 4 years, our four oldest kids will be out of high school. That is a very different stage of life than where I sit today with multiple kids in high school. Life, relationships, and pastoral ministry will differ greatly for us in 4 years from this simple fact.

But too many of us wake up one day and realize that life happened to us.

Too many of us wake up one day and realize that life happened to us.
Click To Tweet

Here are some things that will be different: my schedule will be different in four years. Lord willing, I will have finished my doctorate by then. I will be four years older and have four more years of wisdom than I lack today. My physical life will be different because I will be closer to 50.

All this became even clearer to me several years ago when I spent a summer talking to pastors nearing retirement and asking them about wisdom, things they learned, and things they wish they would’ve done differently. They all said, “If you don’t plan financially, spiritually, physically, mentally, relationally, and emotionally for your future, you will miss all God has for you.”

Many of us only think about the physical or financial side of our future.

As more and more studies are done on life stages, our 50s, 60s, and 70s can be our most productive decades for God. And yet, many pastors and Christians seem to think that it is over once you are past 40.

As more and more studies are done on life stages, our 50s, 60s, and 70s can be our most productive decades for God. And yet, many pastors and Christians seem to think that it is over once you are past 40.
Click To Tweet

My hope for you and me is that our best days are ahead of us, whatever those best days may be for you. 

The post Learning to Dream Again appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Alexander Michl on Unsplash

Picture this. 

You have accepted a new job as the new lead pastor at ________ church. You have moved your family or moved offices if it is a succession process. You are excited and ready to go. 

You want to come out of the gate strong in your first sermon and sermon series. You want to show who you are and cast a vision for what is next. You are ready. 

But what do you talk about? How do you connect with people who don’t know you? How do you connect with people you don’t know? 

In the back of your mind, you wonder, what if you bomb? What if you choose a topic that no one is excited about or say the wrong thing and step on a landmine you didn’t know was there?

Go here to get an idea of what I preached when I first came to CCC in 2021. 

6 things to think through when you arrive at a new church.
Click To Tweet

Know this is just the start. It is hard to remember this when you arrive, and you are excited about this new chapter, and the church is (hopefully!) excited about it, but remember, this is just the beginning of a long ministry. You don’t need to say everything in one sermon or one series. There are specific things you want to hit on in your first sermon and series, but as you stand up that first Sunday and the ones to come, know that this is just the beginning. 

Don’t make any grand pronouncements as you stand up on that first week and in the first months. Don’t discuss goals and numbers or where you will be in 5 years. Just start. 

Now, if you are going into a situation where things are volatile, the church is running out of money, etc., then you might need to share more specific plans to get out of the rut the church is in. But most of the time, you shouldn’t need to do that. 

Find out as much as possible about the history (and where the church is). Hopefully you learned as much as you could about the history and state of the church during the interview process. But if you arrive and still have questions, ask them.

When I arrived at CCC, I interviewed over 30 people and asked them the same eight questions to get an idea of where the church is, what was at the heart of the people here, and trying to learn as much as possible about New England. I read books and blogs about the area I was moving to, talked to previous pastors, etc. You want to become as much of an expert as possible about the place you are stepping into. 

You want to know things like: How many pastors have they had in the last 10 – 15 years? How many staff transitions have they had? Were there any moral failures or firings? Are they excited and hopeful or sad and grieving? Do they trust leadership or struggle to trust leadership? Every new leader walks in with a little bit of leadership change in their pocket because they are new, but depending on what happened before you arrived, that can impact how much trust a group of people give you. 

Find out what they preached before you arrived. This one is more tactical, but find out what they preached before you arrived. Two of the books of the Bible I wanted to preach through had been done in the year before I arrived, so I had to pivot. 

The other reason you want to know this is because it will also give you an idea of where everyone is, what they have been walking through together as a church, and the style of preaching they are accustomed to. While you don’t want to change your preaching style to something it isn’t, knowing what they are used to before you put your unique stamp on things is important. 

Preach on things close to your heart. As you plan your first sermon and series, preach on things you are passionate about and close to your heart. There should be a match between that and where the people are, which is one of the reasons God led you there. Is there anything that God has taught you in the last season of your life or your move that might speak to where the church is?

Let the church get to know you. Part of why you should preach on things close to your heart or things God has taught you recently is because one of your goals in your first sermon series is for your church to get to know you and your story. You can do this by sharing your testimony (which I’ve seen people do on their first week) or weaving things about you into the opening sermon series. At the end of your first month, people should have a clear idea about who you are, your preaching style, your marriage and family, and your spiritual journey. 

Keep in mind the season of the year and the season of the church. The last thing to consider is when you will start preaching in the calendar year and where the church is in the season of its life. 

Arriving in January, Advent, Easter, or the start of school will impact what you preach. 

Is the church excited or hurting? Do they trust or not trust the leadership? These questions help determine their season and what they most need to hear. 

6 things you need to know before you preach your first sermon at a new church.
Click To Tweet

While your first sermon or series doesn’t make or break your ministry at a church, it does set the tone. So it matters to get it right. 

The post Preaching in Your First Year at a New Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Andrik Langfield on Unsplash

Every follower of Jesus is trying to grow in their spiritual practices. But what if our personalities get in the way? What if you are an introvert or an extrovert? You are stunting your spiritual growth because you only do certain spiritual practices instead of ones you tend to dislike or find uncomfortable.

I kept hearing people like Jon Tyson and John Mark Comer talk about a book I had never read, “Invitation to a Journey.” They kept saying, “It’s the best book on spiritual formation.” They were right. 

There were so many insights that stood out but easily, one of the biggest aha moments came when I read this:

Each of us will tend to develop models of spiritual life that nurture our preference pattern. If extroversion is our dominant preference, we will select models of spirituality that bring us together with other people in worship, fellowship groups, prayer groups, Bible-study groups, and spiritual-formation groups. We will want corporate spirituality and not get as much out of private individualized spirituality. If our preference is introversion, we will adopt models of spirituality that emphasize solitude, reflection, meditation, and contemplation. -Robert Mulholland Jr.

As I thought about my own life and preferences, Mulholland was right. You can see in your own life how you make your spiritual life and practices around the ones you enjoy the most. 

Now, that doesn’t mean you abandon the ones you prefer, but it does mean that we need to look at our spiritual lives and see if we are doing what we prefer or engaging in places that are not our preference. 

You might wonder, does this matter?

One thing we are often unaware of that harms our spiritual growth.
Click To Tweet

I would say yes. 

If we only do what we enjoy or find comfortable, we will not grow all our spiritual muscles. Much like a weightlifter who only does an upper body workout, eventually, their legs will weaken. 

Think about how you experience a church or a community. Based on your preference, it is easy to elevate one practice over another. Maybe you wonder why others don’t do more of _____ or why your church doesn’t emphasize ______. Without realizing it, our preference gets elevated, and we begin to judge other Christians because they don’t do what we think is so important. That doesn’t mean it isn’t important, but we can elevate worship, prayer, or solitude over something else because it has helped us or we enjoy it more than other practices. 

This is especially important for pastors to understand. 

Unknowingly, for pastors, we create our churches around our preferences and expect others to grow the way we do. So, as a leader, you must know what you are most likely to emphasize, to make sure you are creating a well-rounded process of developing disciples. 

One thing pastors are often unaware of in their churches.
Click To Tweet

The post One Thing that is Harming Your Spiritual Growth appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Jeff Sheldon on Unsplash

I don’t know if you’ve noticed this in your life, but I have seen it play out in mine and countless others, and it is this: When we experience major life transitions, we reevaluate and rethink our commitments.

When we experience major life transitions, we reevaluate and rethink our commitments.
Click To Tweet

You have seen this play out at your church if you’re a pastor.

Whenever we walk through a life transition: birth, death, divorce, retirement, becoming an empty nester, going to college or grad school, or moving, we also tend to pull away from community and church.

The latest data backs this up, pointing out that moving is the number one reason people leave church.

Let me be clear. I’m not saying this is right or wrong, only that it is real.

Maybe you had someone in your church who was highly involved, and then all their kids moved out of the house, and they stepped back from their community group and serving teams. Maybe someone retired who was a group leader is now taking a break.

This is natural, and I’m not bemoaning in any way, shape, or form. Just as we enter new life stages, we make changes.

One reason is that our lives have changed.

When you add a child to your family, your life is different. When you enter the teenage years or become an empty nester, your life has taken on new responsibilities and meaning.

It is a time to pull back and ask yourself some questions.

All that preamble leads to this post: Pastors need to be more aware of this as they bring people into leadership and how they navigate transitions. When we add someone or someone leaves one of our teams, we overlook what is happening in their personal lives or what is on the horizon in their personal lives. 

As leaders, we also need to be aware of the transitions we are walking through, will walk through, and prepare for those. We need to do the same for those we serve with.

This doesn’t mean you make major changes to your life whenever you go through life stage transitions, but it is also a normal part of life.

Over the last decade, I have seen this play out time and again with people in the church. Now, I am more aware of it. Are we putting someone into leadership who is about to have a life stage transition? I have conversations with people on my team about the transition they are walking through, what they need, how it affects them, and their role. 

There is very little we can do about this reality because it is real and an important part of life, leadership, and church involvement, but we must be aware of it as pastors. 

One surprising reason people stop attending church or change their serving patterns.
Click To Tweet

The post Major Life Transitions and our Commitments appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Karl Fredrickson on Unsplash

If you’re a pastor, married to one, or in church leadership, you have probably experienced a Sunday morning where everything that could go wrong went wrong.

It might be technical difficulties, angry church members, a sick child (or being sick yourself), a volunteer canceling at the last minute, or maybe you woke up and didn’t feel like leading and preaching that day.

I’ve been in church ministry since I was 18, and these Sundays happen more often than I wish.

Recently, I had one of these Sundays. I slept horribly on Saturday night; I woke up not feeling great, my sermon seemed off and disconnected, and the mood in the church just felt hard.

This will happen. Chances are good; it might happen this weekend to you.

As pastors and ministry families, we aren’t helpless in these moments. But it takes some preparation and wisdom to navigate these moments.

As I looked back, here are six things to remember and do:

What to do when Sunday morning goes off the rails.
Click To Tweet

Prepare on Saturday night. We do very little on Saturday nights. We try our best to have a quiet night at home, watch something funny, try to relax, and get a good night’s sleep.

How your Sunday morning goes as a pastor starts with how your Saturday night goes.

Very few people will feel what you feel. This is good and bad. It is good because even if you feel off, your church might not. It can be frustrating because we’d like people to relate to us on this level, but that’s a different post.

Over the years, I’ve learned that just because I feel something at church doesn’t mean everyone feels something. Just because I feel off with a sermon or something feels out of sync, that might be just me. Now, there will be Sundays where what you feel, everyone feels. So be aware of the feeling, but also don’t overthink what you feel. 

It will happen at some point. While this won’t be a regular occurrence (hopefully!), it will happen at some point.

Pastor, here’s how to handle a difficult Sunday morning.
Click To Tweet

This means you must plan how to handle it mentally, emotionally, relationally, and spiritually. How will you calm your mind and body to do what you need to do? How will you refocus?

This is why your prep and run-through are so important. I’m a big believer in doing a sermon run-through and think more pastors should do it. Whenever I have a stressful or difficult Sunday morning, I am thankful for the prep I’ve done and that I’ve already run through my sermon. This takes a massive weight off my shoulders regarding feeling prepared for what is ahead.

The power of prayer. One thing our elders do with whoever is preaching is pray over them before the service. This moment on a Sunday morning is incredibly powerful to me. To come together, share where I am, and have trusted leaders pray with and for me.

Take a deep breath and go. Ministry and leadership are hard. This is all over the New Testament, but whenever it gets hard, we are surprised. We must know the difficulty ahead of us, pray, be prepared, take a deep breath, and go.

6 ways to prepare for a Sunday morning as a pastor.
Click To Tweet

The post When Everything Falls Apart at Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.