It seems around Christmas, whatever feelings we have during the year intensify.
If we are feeling excited and happy, that seems to grow. If we are feeling lonely and sad, that also intensifies.
For many of us, though, it is the darker feelings that we tend to feel more deeply around the holidays. The feelings of being alone, or anxious, or depressed. Feelings of being left out or being let down because the holidays didn’t go as we planned.
In those moments, it can feel like we are the only ones who think that way, to feel forgotten by others (and by God). When that happens, we can miss what is happening and what God is trying to do in those moments.
One of the most fascinating stories in the Bible is the story of Elijah in 1 Kings 17 – 19. Elijah is a prophet in the Old Testament who takes on the prophets of Baal, who challenges the king and queen (the most influential people in his world) and wins. And yet, when Queen Jezebel threatens Elijah, he runs for his life into the wilderness, prays to God that he would die, and complains that he is all alone.
Elijah shows us, though, how God meets us in our loneliness, how God meets us in our depression and sadness.
In this passage, I think there are some questions we should ask ourselves about our loneliness and darker feelings around the holidays. Because our emotions are real, but our feelings also tell us things that we can easily miss.
Here are 5 questions to ask ourselves during the holidays as we process our feelings of loneliness and exhaustion:
Is there any high that I just experienced that has led to my low? One of the things that happened in the life of Elijah is an incredible moment. While standing on Mt. Carmel, when he challenges the prophets of Baal and Asherah, he prays, and God answers by sending fire from heaven. We’re told that the whole nation repented and worshiped God.
Right after this is when Elijah experiences a very low moment, when he experiences the depth of his loneliness and depression.
We often overlook this in life. We are so busy and running on adrenaline throughout the holidays, and then we are hit with exhaustion and deeper feelings. Elijah’s life shows us that this can be normal and something we need to prepare for. Do you have space in your life to feel, to process your feelings from the holidays? To process being around family and all that that can mean?
Has God answered a prayer recently that I forgot about? As Elijah runs into the wilderness, he has forgotten all that God has done, how God answered his prayer and how God has moved.
Around the holidays, much of our focus is on what we don’t have, what didn’t go right, what we missed out on. And those things matter. But we also need to look at what we do have, how God has moved, how God has answered prayers, and what blessings we have.
How has God provided for me (food and nap)? When Elijah runs into the wilderness and tells God that he wants to die, God doesn’t respond to that. It is fascinating to me what God does. God provides Elijah with what he needs: food and a nap.
Never underestimate the power of food and sleep, especially when we are feeling some deep things. The cold, winter darkness can become incredibly dark. And while the morning is not a cure-all, things do change after a good night’s sleep. This isn’t to lessen the feelings we have or even the importance of medication or a good Christian counselor, but a reminder of the difference between day and night.
It is also a reminder to make sure you are eating well and sleeping well during the holidays. We will fill ourselves with more sugar and potentially alcohol, which can exacerbate our lack of sleep, which we are already getting less of because of the pace of the holidays. So, make sure you plan to get good sleep and have a plan for eating well.
How is God being patient with me? God’s patience with Elijah is incredible.
He listens to Elijah’s complaints, to his whining (and Elijah does start whining), and he provides Elijah with food and a nap, and he responds to Elijah.
This is an incredible reminder of God’s grace and patience which we so easily forget.
God will respond; God will listen and not scold. He doesn’t tell Elijah to man up or stop complaining; he doesn’t tell Elijah he is ridiculous. Instead, he listens and patiently responds. God has so much patience for us. Never forget that.
God came to Elijah, how has God come to me? While God shows up to the nation of Israel with fire and famine, when God comes Elijah, he does so through food and a nap, and then a whisper.
It is easy, especially around the holidays, to miss how God has come to us. We often look for significant, spectacular movements (which God does. But God often shows up in the everyday, simple things. God shows up in the beautiful sunsets and sunrises, the embrace and company of a friend, the simple gifts, the quiet snowfall, the crackling fire.
Be sure to take time to look for God in simple, everyday places and situations.
