Last Sunday in our series Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets, we asked the question, In light of my past experiences, current circumstances, and future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing to do?

So, let’s get real specific on that. 

What are your future hopes and dreams as it relates to the following:

• Finances
• Career
• Family
• Friends
• School 
• Health
• Spiritual growth

Twelve months from now, where do you hope to be?

I want to encourage you to be specific on this. Too often, we have vague goals, fuzzy hopes and dreams. 

One of my favorite Andy Stanley quotes is, “Everybody ends up somewhere in life. I recommend you end up somewhere on purpose.”

Now that you are clear on your future hopes and dreams let’s work backward. 

Of all the questions that Andy shares in his book Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets: 5 Questions to Help You Determine Your Next Move, this is my favorite and the one I use the most with my kids and in my own life. It is also one of the main reasons we left Arizona and moved to New England.

So, how do we end up somewhere on purpose? How do we make decisions, so we don’t sell ourselves a regret?

By asking, In light of my past experiences, my current circumstances, and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing to do?

Let’s break this down one at a time.

Your past. 

Your past is yours. It’s unique. It is your story; it is what has gone before you. Your story is different from any other story on the planet. 

Your experiences, relationships, how you’ve handled money are unique to you. Yes, there are similarities to others, but yours have shaped your past.

How your parents’ marriage went and how they handled money. 

All of those things are part of your past and are essential. What your past is, though, is something important. It shows you some things you can easily fall into, some temptations that could snag you that might not snag someone else. It offers you things you need to pay attention to and be aware of. 

So, In light of your past experiences, what is the wise thing to do?

It might mean you don’t go to certain places or watch certain things. It might mean you have boundaries other people don’t. But our past matters. 

Current circumstances. 

This is the reality that life is seasonal. 

The energy you have as a teenager is different than that of an empty nester. 

The risks you take in your 20’s are a bit different than in your 40’s.

Your emotional state is different right now than it was five years ago. 

The reality for all of us is the impact covid has had on our world and our emotional, physical, and mental well-being. 

What is going on in your life right now as you face that decision? What is your marriage like? How much time and energy do you have for that new opportunity? How will it affect your most important relationships if you do this or that?

Often, we think about what it will bring if we say yes; we rarely ask if we can handle it. Or we assume everyone will adjust because “it’s my life and my dream.” But those who have to change are part of your current circumstances. 

Sometimes we need to wait, defer, pause, postpone or sit one out. 

Is now the time to start that business in light of your current circumstances?

Should you get back in a relationship in light of your current circumstances?

Should you go back to school in light of your current circumstances?

This is why Paul tells us to pay attention (Ephesians 5:15 – 17). We often know the answer to these questions, but we don’t like them. 

A series of unwise decisions always precede our greatest regrets. 

This brings us to the last part:

Future hopes and dreams. 

What has God placed on your heart? What dreams do you carry? What hopes do you have?

Too often, we make decisions that jeopardize our future hopes and dreams. 

We do this by saying things like, “I’m not doing anything illegal, people do this all the time, I’m not hurting anyone, I can handle it. God will forgive me.”

We say those things right before we get a regret to carry.

In light of my past experiences, my current circumstances, and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing to do?

For our family, this was a question we consistently asked ourselves as we interviewed with churches around the country and tried to discern what God was saying to us. Our past experiences kept us from particular churches and situations. Our current circumstances made us turn down some things. And our future hopes and dreams helped us make sure that we asked the right questions.