Recently, I got to speak to a group of young leaders on how to lead when you aren’t in charge.
It isn’t easy to be on a team, to follow another leader, especially if you don’t respect them or like their vision. Yet, we will have to lead at different points in our leadership journey when we aren’t in charge.
I spent years not being in charge, and I didn’t lead well. I was prideful and not a very good follower, and God taught me many things. I stumbled through my early years of leadership. Then, after being a lead pastor for 12 years, God put me in a second chair for two years. It was hard, but exactly where I needed to be to learn some lessons about myself and leadership. Those two years have changed how I lead today in meaningful ways, but that’s a different post.
If you find yourself leading when you aren’t in charge, there are some essential things you can do. Now, if you google leading when you aren’t in charge, you will find a host of articles and podcasts that will say a lot of the same things: be humble, be teachable, know that you have influence where you are, etc. And those are all true. I’m going to assume that you already know those things and are doing those things; that’s why you’re a leader.
So, with that in mind, here are 5 other things you can do to lead when you aren’t in charge:
Be content where you are. You aren’t where you want to be or where you will ultimately be, and that’s frustrating, but it is also a good thing.
A lot of leadership and following Jesus is about contentment.
Be content.
Be thankful too. You aren’t having to make certain decisions and carry a certain weight.
If you weren’t in charge through covid, you didn’t carry a weight that others did.
If you aren’t the lead pastor, you probably don’t feel the weight of making sure your whole church is protected, that the bills get paid, or whether you’ll have to shut down again because of covid or something else. Yes, you feel those weights to a degree, but not the way your lead pastor does.
You don’t have everyone coming to you about something. That is a good thing. Yes, people come to you, but what do you do with that? You often “pass it up the chain” to the one leading.
I led worship at a large college ministry in college and then went on staff at a church as the student ministry worship leader. For the first three months, I didn’t lead worship. My boss had me reset rooms, move chairs, take out the trash, follow up with people, etc. I was so annoyed, and I told him so, because I was 19 and knew it all. He looked at me and said, “You’ll be on stage when you are content to be off stage.”
God wants to teach you things about yourself, Him, and others in this season.
I love what Crawford Loritts said, “God won’t give you what you want because you won’t stick around long enough to get what you need.”
It is easy to quit; looking for an easy way out at this point, trying to force your way into a leadership position. But if you do, you might miss what you need for later.
Understand the person you follow.
As important as it is to know yourself and how you’re wired, and how your family and upbringing have affected you, it is equally important to know this information about the person you follow.
Do they need time to process? Do they talk out loud? What do they value most, and why do they value that so much? What are their rhythms in terms of work? When is the best time to bring up an idea?
I had two bosses in one role, one wanted to speak in specifics, and when he said something, that was it. The other liked to process out loud and throw things at the wall. One wanted specifics when I came to him, and the other wanted me to share at the beginning of an issue so he could be involved.
Could you get to know them, be a student of them? If you don’t know, ask them. If you are new to a church or team, ask a lot of questions of those you work with and work under.
Know what you can change and can’t change under that person.
Your boss, board, or leader cares about certain things. Some things are mission-critical that they are passionate about, and then other things they aren’t. You need to know what those things are. What is #1 on their list that they will protect against all costs?
Often, those things are non-negotiable, or you will have some difficulty changing those things.
But what can you change?
Are there things they aren’t as clear on, as passionate about that you can experiment with? If so, spend some energy there.
This also gets into understanding the team culture and dynamics. To change things, do you need to keep quiet, or bring them up? How does something get changed?
Be someone that can be counted on.
The best thing you can do for those around you to gain more influence and move into the leadership roles you want is to be someone who can be counted on and gets things done.
When you do this, you are making your boss’s job easier.
One thing that people leading want to know is if their team is with them. Making sure your boss or leader knows you have their back in the meeting, and outside of the meeting matters greatly.
In being someone who can be counted on, you also fulfill a vital leadership principle, making your boss’s job easier.
Craig Groeschel refers to this as being the chief problem solver.
Know where the power resides.
This might be one of the most important and overlooked things you need to know when you aren’t in charge. If you miss this and underestimate its power, you will find yourself in a world of hurt and going down the wrong road.
You need to know where the power resides in meetings, who makes things happen, and who stops things from happening. And know, this isn’t always the person at the top. It could be the gatekeeper for someone, the person with more details than others. I remember starting at a church and going through orientation and then having an admin tell me, “Now, let me tell you how things get done here.” That’s power.
If you don’t understand where the power resides, it will create a lot of headaches for you and missteps as you try to build influence.
When you aren’t in charge, you need to know who you influence and in what area. What area does each person influence (this isn’t always clear in job descriptions)? Who makes the final call on something? Who is responsible for carrying something out? Who sways the meeting when they speak? Who speaks first and last, and what does that do to the room?
Every church has a hierarchy, but you need to understand that what is written down is not always the way it is.
Know that you have influence.
Just because you are in charge doesn’t mean you hold all the influence.
I’ve been at my church for almost a year. I have influence and power.
The others on staff have more influence than I do because of how long they’ve been there. They have sat at more hospital bedsides and walked with more people than I have. Do not underestimate the influence you have in the seat you sit in. Relational influence is incredibly powerful in a church setting.
As I was going through that hard season in Tucson, I had a mentor tell me something important: Know what you control, what you influence, and what is a concern. Too often, in our passion and excitement, we confuse these categories, and sometimes we need a friend or spouse to help us know the difference.
Be clear on what you have control over or where you only have some influence. If you have some influence, know that it is more than none, and use what you have. Sometimes, it is something you are concerned about or don’t like, but you have no power or influence to change it. Too many leaders spend leadership capital on things that are a concern, something they’d like to change. That doesn’t make it not worth it, but it can be costly in the long run.
