When word first came out that schools were closing and we were supposed to stay home as much as possible, I think a lot of us thought, “time off!”
But then reality set in.
Our kids would suddenly be at home all day.
The reality of us or someone we love, getting sick started to sink in. The stress and anxiety of going grocery shopping and lines starting at 5:30 am like black Friday, except it’s every day.
What about our finances, our career, savings, retirement? A friend told me in one day; she lost everything she gained in a decade towards her retirement.
If you have kids, you are also navigating their stress and anxiety about all of this. They are being marked and shaped by this pandemic. They feel your stress, as well as the stress in their little bodies. You might be trying to help aging parents and trying to convince them to stay in.
And it’s a lot!
Something else happens when we sit at home. Memories come back. The voices and messages in our heads get louder.
Guilt, shame, regret, anxieties we thought we had gotten over, addictions we thought we were past, creep back in.
You see, in the busyness of life, we can sometimes drown these out. As we run from one meeting to the next, crossing things off our to-do list, it is easy to drown out those things and not think about them. That is one reason we are as busy as we are; it keeps us from being alone with ourselves and our thoughts.
But now, life is quieter, so those voices are louder.
We sit on our couch, endlessly scrolling through Netflix and think about missed opportunities: what if we had taken that job, made that choice differently last year, would my life be somewhere else now?
It feels like right now that a lot of things are stacked against us and those that we love.
We started a series this past Sunday, called Against all odds because right now, it can feel like we are on the ropes, that we are stuck, that there is no hope. If we’re honest, we feel like that right now. We are fighting for hope about our job and the economy. We are fighting against fear for our health and those that we love.
But in Jesus, there is always hope.
The theme for this whole series is found in Romans 8:31 says If God is for us, who can be against us?
Do you know what is incredible about this verse? Not only what it says but that most of us don’t live like it is true.
Many of us live as if God is against us.
And the reason for many of us is most of our life we have felt like people were against us.
Many of us haven’t had the feeling of people being in our corner, so we wonder if God is like that.
Often, in moments like this, we will ask why questions. Why has God allowed this to happen? Why doesn’t God stop this? Why didn’t God step in to do what we think he should do?
But I think there is a more profound question lurking for us. And the answer to that question influences how we answer the why questions.
And it’s this: When God looks at me, what does He think?
When you come to God’s mind, what does he think?
Does he look at you and me like a disappointed dad, shaking his head at our mistakes, our worries?
Does he look at you and say, “be a man, be tougher!”
Stop being a failure, stop flipping out at your kids, and get your act together.
Most of us think that is what God thinks.
Others of us feel forgotten by God; we wonder if he is there, does he hear my prayers?
We wonder, in these stressful, anxious moments, does God love? Does he care about me? Does he know what is keeping me up at night, and does he care?
But that isn’t the picture the Bible gives us of God.
Instead, we see a God who comes to us. Who rescues us. Who steps into the mess of our world to pick us up, clean us off, and hold us.
Pastor Ray Ortlund said, “Being forgiven, in Jesus means that we are not holding on to Jesus as much as he is holding on to us.”
Let that sink in for a moment.
Jesus is holding on to you. In your brokenness, in your lust, your struggle, your hangups, hurts, and addictions.
He is holding you.
