The Things that Sneak into the Heart of a Pastor

Every week when a pastor preaches, they talk about the sin that binds the people in their church, the idols they battle, the lies they quickly fall into, and the truth of Jesus that frees them and destroys sin and death.

Pastors, by and large, often struggle to apply this same medicine to their sins.

Much of the identity and idols that pastors fall into are residing in what happens on a Sunday morning at church. High attendance, strong giving, and loud singing were good days. A pastor will float through Sunday night, post about all that God did on Instagram, and wake up ready to charge hell on Monday morning.

Low attendance, a down week in giving, few laughs, and no one sings, and the pastor will go home, look at social media, get jealous of the megachurch down the road, wake up Monday morning ready to resign, and get another job.

The difference between the two examples?

The heart of the pastor.

Over the years as a pastor, I’ve ridden this roller coaster more than I’d like to admit. It is easy to do.

So, how do you handle this as a pastor? How do you protect your heart?

1. Keep Sundays in perspective. What happens and what you feel as a pastor on a Sunday morning can be misleading. Just because it felt great doesn’t mean that it was. I’m amazed at how many times I feel like a sermon was so-so, and the response from people is, “That is exactly what I needed to hear.” And how many times do I get off the stage thinking I preached my greatest sermon, and no one says anything.

While Sunday matters, it does not tell the whole story of what God is doing in the life of your church or its people.

2. Be cautious about what you see on social media. A friend of mine who is revitalizing a church called me and said, “It’s so hard to watch the megachurch down the road baptize more people on Easter than we had in attendance.” And that’s a real struggle.

Be cautious about what you follow on social media and when you look at it. If you are exhausted and feeling down on Sunday night, Instagram may not be the best spot for your soul.

Another thing to remember is percentages. This is important. Every pastor would say that every life matters, but when you see thousands getting baptized or a massive move of God, it is hard not to feel jealous or inferior. But a megachurch and a church plant are not the same, just like the small start-up isn’t the same as Amazon. For example, if a church of 5,000 baptized 80 people on Easter, that is incredible, but they baptized 1.6% of their church. If your church of 250 baptized 10, that is 4%. Yes, they both matter the same, but, and this may seem silly to you, percentages have helped me to keep things in perspective when my heart gets out of line.

3. Celebrate what God does in the church down the road or across the country. The flip side of this coin is essential. Celebrate what God is doing in other churches, don’t despise it. Don’t say, “They must be watering down the gospel; that’s why they’re growing.” Just celebrate with them, and thank God for how His Spirit is at work.

4. Make sure you do something life-giving on Sunday or Monday. Many pastors, when they get home on Sundays, are entirely spent. While it is exhilarating, it is also exhausting to preach, counsel, pray with others, and often leave church shouldering the people’s burdens in your church. That is part of what a pastor does. But in that, you must make sure that you refill your tank.

Too many pastors go home and sit down in front of the TV or scroll on their phones. While there is a place for this, you need to schedule some life-giving things for you.

We try to take a long walk on Sunday afternoon to get outside and move our bodies. Some reading time or a family game, and one of our practices on many Sunday evenings is to have another family or friends over for dinner.

Whatever is life-giving for you, a hobby, exercise, community, reading, do that on Sunday or Monday. Refill yourself after pouring so much out.

5. Spend time with Jesus and friends. Friends and community are critical. And many pastors struggle with this. And I get it. It can be hard to have close friends within your church because you are always the pastor to them. It can be worked through, but you need friends, whether in your church or outside.

It would help if you refilled your soul after pouring it on a Sunday. On Mondays, make sure you spend time alone with Jesus and read a book that fills your soul that isn’t related to sermon prep. Grow yourself.

If recent studies are any indication (and I think they are), it will continue to be a challenge to be a pastor.

You must make protecting your heart a priority.