8 Ways to Read the Best books

I love books. This isn’t a secret if you’ve been around my blog for a long time or follow me on Instagram.

And now is a great time to be reading and finding great books (and to broaden your reading).

So, here are eight ways to know if you are limiting your reading and what to change to find the best books:

Every book you read is from your theological camp. There are a lot of crazy religious ideas out there, so you need to be wise about what you read. But the reality is though, you don’t know everything, and you certainly don’t have the bible and every theological idea all figured out. I don’t either. It is good to read authors who believe differently than you so that you can be challenged. Now a short note, if you are new in your faith, this isn’t a good idea as you don’t have the foundation to question yet. If that’s you, ask your pastor or a respected Christian for some book recommendations.

Every book you read has bible verses in them. You should read some books by authors and leaders who don’t follow Jesus. As a pastor, one of the reasons is to learn how to communicate with people around you. To learn something, you may not know but also to see what people who walk through the doors of your church believe. This also helps when you have conversations with people who don’t follow Jesus so that you can relate to things they are thinking about and books they are reading.

Every book you read confirms what you already believe. This is similar to the first one, but if you put a book down and have not learned something new, you wasted your time.

You finish every book you start. I get asked a lot why I don’t write negative book reviews on Instagram. People will often say, “all you ever say is how great a book was or how much you loved a book.” The reason? If I don’t like a book by p. 40, I put it down. Life is too short to read a book you don’t like or isn’t teaching you anything. If it’s poorly written or boring or not challenging, it’s off the list. Don’t feel the need to finish every book you start or to read every chapter of a book; they may not all be relevant.

Books don’t challenge your heart. Similar to point 3, but you should be challenged or convicted from a book. You should find ways to improve your preaching, leadership skills, or your faith, being a spouse or parent. If not, put it down. If a book does not put the magnifying glass up to your heart and life, it isn’t worth the time.

You never read a novel. I love novels. I love stories about spies or lawyers in particular and have recently started to read more and more historical books. As you can see, I always have a historical book on the reading list.

Every book you read is for a sermon. This doesn’t apply to everyone. But if you’re a pastor, this is easy to do because you have to write a sermon each week and are always creating content for social media or classes. You should read books that have no application in a sermon. It also sometimes happens that you are reading a book that you discover something that will work in a sermon, that’s great too. If you are doing a series on marriage, you should be reading a book on money or grace just to keep growing in other areas.

Every book you read is by a pastor. You should read books by CEOs, bankers, doctors, trainers, money managers, scientists, not just pastors or speakers.

God is for You

When word first came out that schools were closing and we were supposed to stay home as much as possible, I think a lot of us thought, “time off!”

But then reality set in. 

Our kids would suddenly be at home all day. 

The reality of us or someone we love, getting sick started to sink in. The stress and anxiety of going grocery shopping and lines starting at 5:30 am like black Friday, except it’s every day. 

What about our finances, our career, savings, retirement? A friend told me in one day; she lost everything she gained in a decade towards her retirement. 

If you have kids, you are also navigating their stress and anxiety about all of this. They are being marked and shaped by this pandemic. They feel your stress, as well as the stress in their little bodies. You might be trying to help aging parents and trying to convince them to stay in. 

And it’s a lot!

Something else happens when we sit at home. Memories come back. The voices and messages in our heads get louder. 

Guilt, shame, regret, anxieties we thought we had gotten over, addictions we thought we were past, creep back in. 

You see, in the busyness of life, we can sometimes drown these out. As we run from one meeting to the next, crossing things off our to-do list, it is easy to drown out those things and not think about them. That is one reason we are as busy as we are; it keeps us from being alone with ourselves and our thoughts. 

But now, life is quieter, so those voices are louder. 

We sit on our couch, endlessly scrolling through Netflix and think about missed opportunities: what if we had taken that job, made that choice differently last year, would my life be somewhere else now?

It feels like right now that a lot of things are stacked against us and those that we love. 

We started a series this past Sunday, called Against all odds because right now, it can feel like we are on the ropes, that we are stuck, that there is no hope. If we’re honest, we feel like that right now. We are fighting for hope about our job and the economy. We are fighting against fear for our health and those that we love. 

But in Jesus, there is always hope. 

The theme for this whole series is found in Romans 8:31 says If God is for us, who can be against us?

Do you know what is incredible about this verse? Not only what it says but that most of us don’t live like it is true. 

Many of us live as if God is against us. 

And the reason for many of us is most of our life we have felt like people were against us. 

Many of us haven’t had the feeling of people being in our corner, so we wonder if God is like that. 

Often, in moments like this, we will ask why questions. Why has God allowed this to happen? Why doesn’t God stop this? Why didn’t God step in to do what we think he should do?

But I think there is a more profound question lurking for us. And the answer to that question influences how we answer the why questions. 

And it’s this: When God looks at me, what does He think? 

When you come to God’s mind, what does he think?

Does he look at you and me like a disappointed dad, shaking his head at our mistakes, our worries? 

Does he look at you and say, “be a man, be tougher!”

Stop being a failure, stop flipping out at your kids, and get your act together. 

Most of us think that is what God thinks. 

Others of us feel forgotten by God; we wonder if he is there, does he hear my prayers?

We wonder, in these stressful, anxious moments, does God love? Does he care about me? Does he know what is keeping me up at night, and does he care?

But that isn’t the picture the Bible gives us of God.

Instead, we see a God who comes to us. Who rescues us. Who steps into the mess of our world to pick us up, clean us off, and hold us.

Pastor Ray Ortlund said, “Being forgiven, in Jesus means that we are not holding on to Jesus as much as he is holding on to us.”

Let that sink in for a moment. 

Jesus is holding on to you. In your brokenness, in your lust, your struggle, your hangups, hurts, and addictions.

He is holding you.

How to Rest Well

All of us right now are experiencing a new kind of world.

We are forced to stay home and forced to stay in.

We are forced to rest.

But how do you rest well? While we may not see it this way, right now is a great opportunity.

An opportunity to rest.

If you are a leader or are striving to be successful, you plan out your life. Each day, your layout, what will it take for you to be successful. You look at your to-do list, and you create a plan so that it isn’t haphazard.

This is great and needed.

Many leaders, though, do not do this when it comes to rest.

But, being productive means planning your time off as much as planning your time on.

So, how does this work?

Each night, lay out what you hope to accomplish the next day. Not just through tasks and to-do lists, but also what will help you to rest. Do you need to get outside? Set your phone down for a day? Are you hoping to take a nap? Read a book?

Doing this helps you to layout your day to make sure that you can rest, that you can re-connect to those around you and God.

7 Ways to Work from Home Successfully

work from home

It is becoming more and more common to work remotely. Not only in offices but for churches. Especially with the rise of church plants, more and more pastors find themselves working from coffee shops, their house,s or shared workspace.

In our world today, more and more companies are sending workers home to stop the spread of coronavirus.

The transition to this or starting your own business in your house can be difficult. I’ve worked from home for at least half of my week for the last decade and, through trial and error, have found some things that have worked (and not worked).

Here are seven ideas to work from home successfully:

  1. Get dressed. It is tempting to get up, throw on a hat and stay in your pajama pants, but fight this urge. Get a shower, eat a good breakfast, grab some coffee, and go to work. The more you can make it like work, the better. Getting dressed gets your blood moving and helps you to move into “work mode.”
  2. Have a designated workspace. Depending on your set up, this can be hard, but you must have a workspace. If you can have a room with a door, this is ideal but not completely necessary. I’ve had seasons where my office was a kid’s bedroom, and that is part of it. But have a space set aside where you do work. If it is at the dining room table, it makes it challenging to stop working or disconnect mentally.
  3. Have a clear start and stop time. Some jobs that work remotely have this built-in. I have a friend who works for a call center but does it in his house, so he has to sign in at a specific time. For others, like a pastor, this isn’t as clear. It is crucial to define, especially if you are married and have kids, when you will start and when you will stop. This will help to prevent working more than you should and having a clear boundary.
  4. The water cooler factor. If you work in an office, interruptions are part of the day. People are stopping by, you getting up to walk around. These can be helpful and intrusive. You must plan for these to work from home. I try to break my day up into 90-minute increments and have a break in between that could be as simple as getting more coffee. Getting up to move around is. Not only helpful for your body and brain, but also creative thinking.
  5. Stay focused. It is easy to work from home and not stay focused. After all, you can see other things that need to be done, and no one is looking over your shoulder telling you not to look at blogs, Facebook, or the news. You must have a system to stay focused on the task at hand. One of the things I installed was Chrome Nanny and put in particular websites that are blocked during my work hours, like social media sites, to help me stay focused.
  6. Handling interruptions. Working from home, you will still have interruptions. Kids are knocking on your door, your spouse asking you to do something. This is part of the flexibility of not being in an office, but you have to have a system for handling them; otherwise, you won’t get any work done. There are times when my door is locked, and the kids leave me alone and times when it is open, and they can do schoolwork or play on my floor while I work.
  7. Disconnecting from work. If you work from home, you walk out of your home office and your home. You don’t get that 30, 60-minute commute to disconnect from work, listen to sports radio, or have some silence before you connect with your family. I used to work, and as soon as I was done, go into family mode. This doesn’t work as I can be on edge or still thinking about work. Now, I workout, take a walk, or read some sports blogs and then go into family mode. You have to learn how to make your commute happen without having a commute.

Friday Five

It’s hard to believe that it is already March!

Hopefully, you are sticking with your goals or word for the year. If not, get back to it. It isn’t too late and you knew 2020 was the year for that focus.

Favorite book:

I have loved Marcus Buckingham’s new book Nine Lies About Work: A Freethinking Leader’s Guide to the Real WorldI love its contrarian take on all things leadership and what we think about work. 

Favorite podcasts:

Carey Nieuwhof’s interview with Susan Steinbrecher on How to lead change, deal with conflict at work and increase team engagement is pure gold. I loved the emphasis she gave in terms of the emotional side of change (something that is easy to forget as leaders) and how best to walk through difficult conversations at work.

Favorite blog posts:

If you don’t want to read all of Marcus Buckingham’s book on work, this article on the feedback fallacy is incredibly helpful and this short video on why feedback fails.

This article on how to see self-awareness, knowing when to leave your leadership post and pass the baton by looking at the journey of Disney CEO, Bob Iger, is an incredible article. I was blown away by his ability to see where he and his company was and leave it in a better position than when he got there. It definitely made me reflect on my ability to do that one day.

Getting Unstuck in Life & Relationships

Have you ever felt stuck in life? In a relationship? Or your career?

This happens in our career where we feel like we’re just going in circles. We feel stuck in our finances, where it seems impossible to get ahead.  Or sometimes, relationally, we feel like a relationship is stuck, or we find ourselves bouncing from one group to another, never really feeling like we belong. Or at a spiritual level, we feel like God is putting something in front of us, something that is out of our comfort zone, and we’re not sure we want to do it.

We’ll try all kinds of things to get unstuck. Books, blogs, counseling. And all those are great, but what about God?

I think for many of us, we wonder if God cares that we’re stuck. Could God help us get unstuck? I know for myself, I often think I’m so small, and the things that I’m facing seem so small in comparison to other items in the world God is dealing with, but we need to remind ourselves, that He cares for each one of us and what we are facing.

What if, an encounter with God gets us unstuck? That sounds so simple. An encounter with God. But how does that work? How do we encounter God?

To answer that, we need to go to a mountain top. Why a mountain top?

For me, I love to be on top of a mountain. When life feels hectic and stressful or hot in the summer in Tucson, going up Mt Lemmon is a breath of fresh air. The cold weather, the quiet, and peace bring clarity to things. It is refreshing. I feel the same way when I stand on a mountain with a snowboard strapped to my feet. I feel closer to God, and I feel more alive.

Have you ever felt that way?

There is a clarity to a mountain top in life; obstacles feel smaller, dreams, and visions for our lives become clearer than in a valley.

Mountaintops bring perspective.

And if we’re honest, God feels closer on a mountain top than in a valley. But encountering God on the mountain reshapes our reality to live in the valley.

Is there something to that? I believe so.

Very often in the Bible, encounters with God happen on mountains.

In the book of Exodus, Moses meets God on a mountain top, and God tells him that He will use Moses to set the nation of Israel free from slavery in Egypt after 400 years. After bringing the nation of Israel out of slavery, God gives Moses the ten commandments for them on a mountain top. Elijah, a great prophet in the Old Testament, heard the still, small voice of God on a mountain top. Jesus often went off to pray and be alone with God on a mountain top. Jesus gave his most famous sermon known as the sermon on the mount, on a mountain top. When Jesus ascended into heaven, and he gave his disciples the call to go into all the world and make disciples, he did it on a mountain top.

This is important, and something easily missed in the busyness of life.

Perspective in life, getting unstuck, involves moving to a new place (not a different city) but getting away from the busyness and daily activities of living.

We know this, but we keep grinding it out, hoping that somehow, something will change for us.

But what happens on the mountain? What happens when we pull away?

What we hope will happen and what will happen are different things.

We hope that God will change everything at once. He will move us here, change this job, fill our bank account, fix that relational issue, or take that hurt away in an instant.

And for some of us, that happens.

Most of the time, though, God simply invites us to what is next.

We can’t move on to what is next until we encounter God.

Friday Five

It’s been a little while since I posted my Friday Five, but here we are. I hope you are staying warm wherever you are. For the most part, Tucson has been an incredible winter with a few days in the ’70s (I know, I know), but I love it when it is in the ’50s, and 60’s here for the winter!

Favorite book:

I recently read Fathered by God: Learning What Your Dad Could Never Teach You by John Eldredge. This book walks through the stages of being a man: boyhood, cowboy, warrior, lover, king, and sage. And while each stage and year have parts of all of these, the masculine journey can be broken up into these parts. A few things stood out: don’t king a man too early, and this happens to a lot of boys when they’re told: “you’re the man of the house early.” While sometimes that can’t be avoided, it causes a lot of harm. Many older men who are in or entering the sage chapter continue to try to be a king, which leads to frustration to them. And lastly, if you don’t give a boy a chance to be a cowboy or a warrior, he will look for ways to do that later in life, and it is often destructive. 

I am getting closer to the end of The Last Kingdom series and love this series. It just keeps getting better and better. If you haven’t checked it out yet, please do. It’s a fun read.

Favorite podcasts:

I just discovered a new podcast, The Paterson Podcast. This is a podcast by the company that helps people create life plans. Katie and I are getting ready to start one as we turn the corner of heading into our 40’s and looking at the second half of our lives and what we believe God holds for us. I’m excited about this process and what we’re going to learn about ourselves through it.

I also just discovered Gabe and Rebekah Lyons’s podcast Rhythms for life. Their episode with Pete Richardson of the Paterson company (see above paragraph) was incredibly informative for us as we look towards creating a life plan. Still, my favorite so far has been the episode with Curt Thompson on what to do when you feel overwhelmed.

Favorite blog posts:

I loved this article on what makes a person rich: IQ or personality. Fascinating.

Building a Healthy Staff Culture

If you are a leader, one of the things you must always think about is culture. The culture of your church or business. The culture of your staff and team.

The problem with culture, though, is that it isn’t always written on the wall. As one author put it, What You Do Is Who You Are. Which means you are continually building culture. 

You are creating it through your interactions, personally and in meetings. You are creating it through how you spend your money and time. You are creating it through how people work in meetings. You are building it through how you handle your own emotions. You are creating it through whether or not you burn out or if you are healthy.

While culture is a squishy thing, a leader must pay attention to it because if you aren’t, your culture will get away from you.

The reason is: Whatever culture you create at work, people will emulate.

If you look around and see dishonest, burned out, or backstabbing people. That’s the leadership and culture.

If they’re honest, balanced, and humble, that’s leadership and culture.

If the marriages in your church are falling apart, that’s leadership and culture.

Those closest to the leader emulate the leader and his or her life and pass those things on. Yes, people make decisions along the way, and a leader isn’t responsible for everyone’s personal choices, but the reality is that a leader shows what makes someone successful or what is allowed.

For example, very quickly in a new job, you learn what it means to be successful somewhere. Can you be late on things? Who holds the real power at a church (hint: it isn’t always the person with the title)? How do things get done?

All of this goes back to culture.

That’s why Henry Cloud famously said: “A leader gets what he or she created or allows.”

Culture will end up determining if you are successful in reaching your goals. But it will also determine where you end up as a leader or a church.

And this is the most important reason to pay attention to it. Because you may not like where you end up, you may not like the church you become.

5 Ways to Handle Disappointment in Ministry

If you are in leadership or ministry long enough, you will have seasons and moments of disappointment. It might be someone you are counseling that walks away and doesn’t want your help. It might be a leader who decides they aren’t on board anymore, and they leave. Some will create division or hurt in your life. Maybe someone is mean to your wife or kids. The list is endless.

What do you do in those moments? For many, these moments are when someone leaves for a new job — explaining how God has called them to a church that will be easier, with fewer problems.

I don’t think that is the answer. Instead, here are five things you can do when you face disappointment in ministry.

You’re still called. Remember that you are called to where God has you. The moments that are the hardest in life and ministry are typically when God is trying to teach you something, your church, family, or team. Is God trying to grow you in an area? Is there sin in your life or something you need to deal with? Falling back on your calling and the leader God created you to be is often one of the essential things to cling to when ministry is hard. 

Stay focused in your area. When leading is hard, everyone else seems to have an easier time. When a Sunday is mediocre for you, go on Twitter, and you will find 20 guys who just had a revival while you preached to the sleeping masses. Don’t look over the fence. Don’t brush up on your resume. Don’t look up churches looking for a pastor. This isn’t the time — water the grass in your church so that it grows. If God wanted you to have what those other pastors are experiencing, he would give it to you. Faithfulness with what is in front of us is one of the most overlooked things when it comes to pastoring in an Instagram world. 

Keep everyone focused. If you are disappointed, it will eventually bleed into your team. You, as a leader, must keep them focused on the vision and away from disappointment. Celebrate whatever you can think of. The energy that you bring to your team, positive or negative, will multiply.

Don’t sin. When you are at a low point in life, sin is right around the corner. Whether it is jealousy, gossip, or falling into an addiction, keep your guard up, be aware. Don’t fail amid disappointment.

Take a break. When you are disappointed, it might be time for a vacation. You may be burning out, running out of things to give those around you, and you need to get a better handle on life and ministry. Pulling back and taking a break is a great way to help gain perspective and be able to continue in what God has called you to.

Know this: disappointment does not last forever. Ministry can be hard, and there are many valleys along the way, but there are also many places of flat walking and mountaintops. Keep pressing forward.

1 Surprising & 1 Not Surprising Thing You need for Spiritual Growth

One of the things many Christians are looking for is how do I grow spiritually?

I think many things can help you grow your faith, but two of them stand out in the New Testament. One that we often talk about and one we do not — one surprising and one that isn’t.

Let’s start with the one that you might expect.

Community. Relationships.

We all know that community and relationships make an enormous impact in positive and negative ways.

Throughout the New Testament, we see that we are to pursue being one with others. We are to love them, care for them, do life with them. Too many of though, are trying to grow spiritually on our own. We are trying to figure out God’s will for our lives, figure out our spiritual gifts and do that all in isolation. The reality is, though, many of those things become more apparent to us in community.

I can’t become all that God wants me to become in isolation.

J.D. Greear said, “The church is to be God’s demonstration community.”

It is through relationships that we show what God is like. It is a willingness to be humble, to love, to serve, to handle complicated relationships, and forgive that we show what God is like.

The second we grow spiritually, and this is the surprising one, or at least, the one we wished weren’t true, and that is difficulties.

When life is going well, relationships are hitting on all cylinders, my career and finances are going well; my perceived need for God goes down. I start to think I can handle most of my life and turn less and less to God.

But when life is hard. When I find myself facing the dark night of the soul or a desert season, I am very aware of my need for God.

While we will run toward community and relationships, we will often do what we can to avoid difficulty in life, but both are needed to grow in our relationship with God.