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Every church starts with the desire to be a healthy, growing church that helps change the community around it with the gospel. No church begins with the desire to be an insular community that has “a country club mentality.”

The longer a church exists, the more difficult it becomes to keep the original vision and excitement. Families grow up, leaders get older, and communities around the church change. Slowly, the leadership team that was bustling with new ideas starts to recycle old ones. What was once new starts to feel stale. 

And many times, the church and its leaders are unaware of the shift that has occurred within them, the church, and the surrounding community. 

The question becomes, what is a church supposed to do? If a church is beginning to decline, can it reverse the decline and return to the glory days? Or are those days past? And if you are in a church that isn’t declining, how do you know if it will begin to decline?

Can a church reverse the decline? Or are the best days behind your church?
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If, as Jim Collins says in Good to Great, “Leadership begins with getting people to confront the brutal facts and act on the implications,” then we as church leaders must confront the brutal facts about our churches and act on the implications. 

Often, the leaders of churches in decline do not want to face the brutal facts. This can happen for several reasons. One, the brutal facts are uncomfortable. It means admitting that what was once a thriving church no longer is. It might mean admitting that they led the church into decline. Two, it means acknowledging that the community around the church has shifted and changed, and the church didn’t change with it. Third, it means facing grief and loss—the loss of influence as a church, the loss of staff and members. Facing the brutal facts means facing reality, and for many people within churches, that brings a lot of discomfort, and we’d rather focus on the positive. 

3 reasons we don’t confront the brutal facts in our churches.
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However, the second part of Collins’s challenge is equally difficult: Act on the implications.

Not only are we to face reality, but we are also to act on what those facts reveal. As we will see, this means praying and asking God for what He has for the church’s future, dreaming together, and experimenting. It might mean ending specific ministries, changing how you do small groups and make disciples, or it might mean changing how the people in the church relate to each other. It is just as uncomfortable as, and possibly more painful than, facing the brutal facts because acting on the implications is the moment of change. 

Acting on the implications is challenging for a church and its leaders. For many leaders, the culture shift is difficult because they are often unaware of it or unprepared to address it. They are blind to the change happening in the community around their church and to the needs of those people. 

How do you face the brutal facts? How do you do that, especially if you are a new leader at your church? Charles Stone says there are five ways to define reality:

1. Take your church’s pulse. 
2. Decipher the unwritten code.
3. Discover the wounds from the past.
4. Clarify the church’s overall health stage. 
5. Match strategy to situation. 

5 ways for pastors to define reality for their church.
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These steps of defining reality help pastors understand the first steps of revitalization, how to move forward, and how to help their people navigate the steps to rebuilding. 

How to define reality for your church when no one wants to see reality.
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At some point in your leadership as a pastor, you will have a staff member, elder, deacon or volunteer resign and say, “I’m done.” It might happen suddenly, as if out of nowhere. It might be mutually a good idea. It may be hard to accept, or it may be a hidden blessing. Regardless of the situation, there are some things you can do to honor them, communicate it in a way that benefits both the person leaving and the organization, and move forward.

Many churches struggle in this area because there is the balancing act of sharing what happened behind closed doors, honoring the person who is leaving, and answering questions people might have who weren’t involved. What makes churches even more challenging than a secular company is the reality of “being the family of God.” How do you fire someone who is part of the family? Because of this, the feelings involved become complicated very quickly. Churches usually either act completely like a public company and use an NDA, or they hold on to someone too long. 

Regardless, at some point, you will have someone resign or you will have to let someone go. 

Here are 8 ideas to navigate that so that it can be helpful for you as the leader, for the person leaving, and for your church: 

8 things to do when a staff member quits.
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1. Find out the whole story from the person. When people leave a situation, they tend not to tell the entire story. They will often tell their boss or ministry leader only what they’re comfortable sharing or what they think the other person wants to hear. Do as much as you can to find out exactly what happened and why they are leaving. Find out what is underneath things and keep digging. This will help you to learn as a leader if you did something wrong or if there is something unhealthy in your church. Avoid simple Christian clichés if possible; instead, ask them to explain it. Too often in these situations, because they are difficult, people in a church environment hide behind “God told me, God is moving me,” etc.

They might not be willing or able to share the whole story with you as their boss, and that is okay. Don’t pressure them. But ask curious questions and listen. Hidden in their frustration or hurt might be some things that you, as a leader, need to learn or things your church needs to face.

2. Honor them and what they’ve done publicly as much as possible. The person leaving has done a lot for your church, whether you want to admit it or not. Even though it is difficult and hurts, honor them. They’ve meant something to you, your church, and others. Honor them. Thank them. Give people a chance to say thank you. People care deeply about how much you honor someone. This gives you an opportunity to demonstrate to others how your church treats people. Someday, your church may treat you the way you treat leaders who have transitioned out of their roles.

As people come up to you, the pastor staying, and share with you how much that person meant to them, or share their frustration and hurt at leaving, don’t get jealous or angry. The ability to differentiate your emotions in this moment is incredibly important.

3. Say what only needs to be said publicly. If sin is involved, relational strife, poor job performance or anything else that is difficult, you don’t need to put that out there. I’m not suggesting that you lie or take an arrow for someone else’s sin or stupidity; you just don’t need to share everything with them. Each situation will dictate what you say. Over the years in the churches I’ve worked in, we’ve had people leave on their own, staff members we’ve let go, had elders or staff members who disqualified themselves, and because each situation is different, it has changed what we said publicly. If the person leaving is not a well-known on-stage figure in the ministry, don’t bring them on stage to say goodbye. Discuss it in the places where this person has touched and affected others.

This one is hard because no matter what you say publicly, it will not be enough for someone in your church. Do your best if you can to answer those questions personally. I always do my best to meet with anyone who wants to meet with me to answer questions in these situations. You should include another leader or elder with you so that you don’t miss something, and that person can also help you navigate your emotions in these meetings. 

What to say and not say publicly during pastoral transitions.
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4. Publicly, focus on the future. When you make the public announcement and have thanked the person or explained what happened, spend as much time as possible focusing on the future and how things will not fall apart. I would say in the “official” announcement, you need to spend 80% of the time on the future. Show people that you are moving forward, and the ministry or church will survive.

This might feel callous to those who were close to the person leaving. And that is real and an important feeling. 

Depending on the person, there is also a whole segment of your church that will shrug when someone leaves. As the leader, you are balancing both of these feelings and thoughts.

5. Be honest publicly and privately. As a pastor, don’t lie. Every fact doesn’t need to be shared, but don’t lie. In private, don’t make things up, don’t bash the person. Have one person you are venting to if it’s a difficult situation, who is speaking into your heart on the situation, but don’t have a team of people you are venting to.

Also, as the leader, you should have someone who loves you who is giving you feedback on your ability to hear what others are saying, how you are responding, and how you are coming across.

6. Honor them financially. Whatever the situation, you are called to shepherd them and care for them. Go above and beyond financially in terms of salary and insurance. Once, we relocated a pastor who had been with us for three months back to Indiana. He wasn’t a fit, and everyone knew it quickly, and they had just moved, so we felt the honorable thing was to move them back to where they came from. Sometimes you give months of salary and benefits, sometimes you give a week. Again, it depends on the situation. One rule of thumb I’ve used is: if this became public, what would people think of us and how we’ve handled this, and what we gave the person? Another way to think about it is, would I want the same treatment I am giving this person?

Again, you are a church and not a business. So while some business principles might apply here, you also need to handle things differently. You need to steward things for your church. 

How long should staff transitions take in a church? The answer might surprise you.
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7. Create a transition plan as quickly as possible. Don’t wait to decide what is next for the ministry. Grieve what is happening, find out the story, and start on a plan. Don’t wait around. If you are the lead pastor or the leader of a ministry area, take the lead and get this done. People will want to know the ship is being steadied and you are moving forward.

Transitions are the seasons when people can leave your church, momentum can be lost, or it can be a moment to move in a new direction and experience new energy and vision.

8. Transition them as quickly as possible. This last one will seem unloving because it is a church environment. When someone says, “I’m done,” they’ve likely been feeling that way for weeks or possibly months; they’ve just now verbalized it. This means their passion is gone, their calling is gone, and they are done. Getting them out of their role as quickly as possible, in the long run, is the best thing for them and the ministry. Staying around for 3-12 months doesn’t benefit anyone. Make a plan, honor them, take care of them, and move them on as quickly as possible.

How to handle staff transitions in a church.
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These situations are sticky, and they are all different. As a leader, you will walk through this too many times to count. Each one hurts. They are people you’ve invested in, loved, cared for, and worked with, and watching them leave always feels personal. You either feel like you did something wrong, missed signs, hired the wrong person, or were lied to or let down. Grieve the situation. Learn as much as you can and move forward to become better and resolve the situation.

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Picture this: You just got a job at a church. You have decided to leave your last ministry, gone through the interview process, sold your house, packed up, and moved your family. You are excited and a little scared, but ready to go.

What do you do first?

Your first steps determine how your ministry goes at that church. The phrase “you only get one shot at a first impression” comes to mind. And that first impression will become a lasting impression.

Often, pastors come to a new church thinking they have all the answers. After all, they got the job and must be the answer person. In many ways, the church does look to the pastor for the answers, to know the vision and where the church is going.

The problem for new pastors is that they don’t know what they don’t know.

The problem for new pastors is that they don’t know what they don’t know.
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One of the things I did in my first six months at CCC was interview almost 50 people. I met with people who had been at the church for decades and ones who had started in the last six months. I talked with people who were long-time Christians, some new Christians, and a few exploring the faith.

My goal was to learn as much as possible about the church from those in it.

I asked them the same 8 questions:

• What is going well at Community Covenant Church?
• What is not going well at CCC?
• What is one thing about CCC you hope doesn’t change?
• What is one thing about CCC you hope will change?
• What burning questions would you like to ask me?
• If money weren’t an issue, what would be your next full-time hire(s) and why?
• If you were in my shoes, what would you focus on first?
• How can I pray for you?

As I listened, I started to get a sense of the story of the people in CCC and the story of CCC from the perspective of the people who lived it. 

How to start a brand new ministry on the right foot.
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When you talk with a search firm that is leading a job search, you hear what they want you to hear. It isn’t wrong or false, but it is often incomplete. Because the search firm doesn’t live in the area or attend the church week in and week out. 

Additionally, when a new pastor comes, he will often want to change the church’s mission, vision, and strategy. Sometimes, this needs to be done quickly; other times, it might be best to wait. As I listened to people’s answers, I started to get a sense of what God had not only done in the life and history of CCC, but also what God might be calling us into next. I was able to start saying back to the staff, elders, and leaders, “This is what I hear people saying, does that sound right to you?”

Too often, we take our vision from what another church did or the last thing we heard in a podcast. That can be a good thing, but I think there is something unique that God wants to do in and through a particular church. That is why He has brought together that group of people in that place at this time. 

I think there is something unique that God wants to do in and through a particular church. That is why He has brought together that group of people, in that place at this time.
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The job of the leaders is to come together with the people to discern that. 

What was amazing to me was how many answers were the same in terms of how people answered these questions. 

The post Starting Strong at a New Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

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Recently, in one of my classes at Fuller, this question was posed:

Reflect on the “crisis of discipleship” revealed during the COVID-19 pandemic. How might thinking of the crisis of discipleship as an adaptive challenge shape your approach to the spiritual formation work of churches? And how might the development of adaptive capacity help better equip the Church for its formative task? 

Adaptive challenges and technical challenges are not the same thing. Thinking of discipleship as a technical challenge would involve meeting and brainstorming new classes or groups. What kind of new studies or sermon series might you come up with to address the crisis in front of you? 

Adaptive challenges require new behaviors, new ways of thinking, and letting go of old ways and old modes. They will also require loss and grief as you enter a new world, one Tod Bolsinger calls canoeing the mountains. 

The crisis of discipleship revealed in churches during COVID-19 is that separating discipleship from mission has stunted our growth as disciples and the health of churches. If the goal of discipleship, as seen in most churches, is “the more you know about God, the more you know God or the closer you are to God,” COVID-19 revealed that it is not true. As churches, we have made discipleship primarily about what is in our heads, rather than about our whole person, thereby separating discipleship from mission. 

Considering this crisis from the perspective of adaptive change involves confronting the notion that discipleship and mission are not separate but are interconnected, forming two sides of the same coin. Discipleship is about transforming the whole person, which leads to our mission in this world. According to writers like Ruth Haley Barton and Jim Herrington, this is a “deeper soul change.” Meeting God in the desert or “crucible of ministry and life.” Much of our discipleship talk and formation in churches has not prepared our people to navigate the desert and the dark night of the soul. My guess is that many pastors in America have not navigated their own desert or dark night of the soul, but that is a different post. 

During COVID, we returned to ‘what we’ve always done.’
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During COVID-19, we returned to our technical change tool belt to do what we’ve always done. If our discipleship was about justice, we focused on justice; if it was about serving or “doing good things,” as one church member told me, we collected food and made masks. Many churches focusing on Bible studies offered more online services and daily messages during COVID-19. 

Looking back, I wonder if all this activity kept us from the silence God wants to invite us into, the silence that could’ve been incredibly beneficial but is also, at times, painful. You see, the moments of solitude throughout Scripture are the places where God meets His people and brings them to places of deeper change. 

We all encountered solitude during 2020, and many of us were unprepared to navigate it. Now, solitude and loneliness are not the same thing. But it is in solitude that the deepest change happens. In solitude, the loudest voices in our souls start talking, bringing up past memories, hurts, or sins, and many of us prefer the busyness of life to the solitude we most desperately need. 

Many of us prefer the busyness of life to the solitude we most desperately need.
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If you get a group of Christians together and ask them what the Bible teaches about sex or what they think about sex, you will probably get predictable answers. Some won’t know what the Bible teaches. Others will talk about the restrictions the Bible has about sex. 

Many Christians speak about sex in very hushed tones, guarded or even embarrassed about it if they speak about it at all. Many churches act like it is a topic they won’t talk about unless it is homosexuality. 

Before preaching on the Song of Songs at my church, when I told people we were preaching through it, I got looks of surprise. Several had no idea what was in it. Often, Christians want to make it a metaphor for Christ and the church, and while that is part of what the Song of Songs teaches us, it teaches us so much more. 

And I think it is one of the most relevant books in the Bible because so many people in the church and outside of the church are confused when it comes to sexuality and what the Bible actually teaches. 

What should Christians think about sex?
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I looked at a popular pastor’s website out of curiosity. This pastor preaches through books of the Bible. In his ministry career, he has preached through every book except one.

The Song of Songs.

Why?

The Song of Songs is just as inspired as the book of Romans!

The Song of Songs is just as inspired as the book of Romans.
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By and large, Christians don’t know how to enjoy sex in the way God created it.

We know how to corrupt it, we know how the culture thinks about it, and so we either run the other direction (don’t enjoy it, don’t explore with your spouse, never talk about it with your kids) or we simply give in to the culture and live like them (adultery, sleeping around, porn, selfishness, sex as a weapon.)

Neither one of those is a good option or even a biblical one.

The Song of Songs shows us what marriage is supposed to be like. Spouses who adore each other, pursue each other, serve each other, seek to please and pleasure each other, all for the good of their marriage. Spouses who complement each other and know what the other likes and dislikes and then use that information to make the other happy.

Our culture, from broken homes, divorce, adultery, and porn, has no idea what sex is supposed to be like. Sex is seen as a weapon to get your way, so women wield it with power in their relationships. Many wives operate from the perspective of: I’ll give you my body, but only as I manipulate you to do what I want.

One of the other struggles our culture has is that our sexual identity has become the trump card and the most important thing about who we are. That is not what the Bible teaches, and when we make that the trump card, we limit ourselves to simply who we are sexually and what we do sexually. We then have a broken image of ourselves and see our value only through the lens of sex. This isn’t surprising when we think about how prevalent porn is.

Your sexual identity is not the most important thing about you.
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The Bible, particularly the Song of Songs, shows us that sex within marriage is not only to be celebrated, enjoyed, and gratifying, but it is also an act of worship to God.

The reason Christians often take the stance they do on sex within marriage (seeing it as dirty, a chore, or prudish about it) is that it is the easy stance to take. To have a healthy view of sexuality will often mean dealing with past addictions, past hurts, past abuse, and body image issues, and all of those are in places we push down, pretend are not there, and try to move forward from without dealing with them.

Sex, intimacy, and affection are the barometer of your marriage.

Sex, intimacy, and affection are the barometer of your marriage.
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If you want to know the health of your marriage, where you are in dealing with past hurts, and how you and your spouse are pursuing each other, simply look at your view of sexuality and intimacy: how intimate you are (sharing your hurts, dreams, joys, and secrets; how open you are), and your affection. I would add how often you are connecting sexually, but that is very nuanced as it relates to the season of life, parenting, and health issues. But if you find yourself pulling away from your spouse for any reason, those are things to pay attention to. 

If you pay attention to those things, you will probably know everything you need to know about the health of your marriage.

Why you should preach through the Song of Songs.
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After spending the last 9 weeks walking through the Song of Songs, I can tell you it is a worthwhile series to do at your church. 

The number of conversations I have had with people young and old, dating, married, single, divorced, and widowed, has been incredible. As you look at what you think of sex, dating, intimacy, and relationships, you uncover a lot that you grew up believing, things your family of origin shaped, and some things you need the cross to reshape and redeem. 

It is a risky series to do. 

I often talk to pastors afraid to step into it because they don’t want to alienate someone in their church. This is a real thing, and it takes a lot of effort to speak to everyone when you are talking about relationships. 

But I also think the reason many pastors don’t preach through this book is that they haven’t navigated the things that will come up in the series in their own marriages. Preaching through the Song of Songs places a massive mirror on the pastor’s life and marriage, which is good and scary at the same time.

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Picture this. 

You have accepted a new job as the new lead pastor at ________ church. You have moved your family or moved offices if it is a succession process. You are excited and ready to go. 

You want to come out of the gate strong in your first sermon and sermon series. You want to show who you are and cast a vision for what is next. You are ready. 

But what do you talk about? How do you connect with people who don’t know you? How do you connect with people you don’t know? 

In the back of your mind, you wonder, what if you bomb? What if you choose a topic that no one is excited about or say the wrong thing and step on a landmine you didn’t know was there?

Go here to get an idea of what I preached when I first came to CCC in 2021. 

6 things to think through when you arrive at a new church.
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Know this is just the start. It is hard to remember this when you arrive, and you are excited about this new chapter, and the church is (hopefully!) excited about it, but remember, this is just the beginning of a long ministry. You don’t need to say everything in one sermon or one series. There are specific things you want to hit on in your first sermon and series, but as you stand up that first Sunday and the ones to come, know that this is just the beginning. 

Don’t make any grand pronouncements as you stand up on that first week and in the first months. Don’t discuss goals and numbers or where you will be in 5 years. Just start. 

Now, if you are going into a situation where things are volatile, the church is running out of money, etc., then you might need to share more specific plans to get out of the rut the church is in. But most of the time, you shouldn’t need to do that. 

Find out as much as possible about the history (and where the church is). Hopefully you learned as much as you could about the history and state of the church during the interview process. But if you arrive and still have questions, ask them.

When I arrived at CCC, I interviewed over 30 people and asked them the same eight questions to get an idea of where the church is, what was at the heart of the people here, and trying to learn as much as possible about New England. I read books and blogs about the area I was moving to, talked to previous pastors, etc. You want to become as much of an expert as possible about the place you are stepping into. 

You want to know things like: How many pastors have they had in the last 10 – 15 years? How many staff transitions have they had? Were there any moral failures or firings? Are they excited and hopeful or sad and grieving? Do they trust leadership or struggle to trust leadership? Every new leader walks in with a little bit of leadership change in their pocket because they are new, but depending on what happened before you arrived, that can impact how much trust a group of people give you. 

Find out what they preached before you arrived. This one is more tactical, but find out what they preached before you arrived. Two of the books of the Bible I wanted to preach through had been done in the year before I arrived, so I had to pivot. 

The other reason you want to know this is because it will also give you an idea of where everyone is, what they have been walking through together as a church, and the style of preaching they are accustomed to. While you don’t want to change your preaching style to something it isn’t, knowing what they are used to before you put your unique stamp on things is important. 

Preach on things close to your heart. As you plan your first sermon and series, preach on things you are passionate about and close to your heart. There should be a match between that and where the people are, which is one of the reasons God led you there. Is there anything that God has taught you in the last season of your life or your move that might speak to where the church is?

Let the church get to know you. Part of why you should preach on things close to your heart or things God has taught you recently is because one of your goals in your first sermon series is for your church to get to know you and your story. You can do this by sharing your testimony (which I’ve seen people do on their first week) or weaving things about you into the opening sermon series. At the end of your first month, people should have a clear idea about who you are, your preaching style, your marriage and family, and your spiritual journey. 

Keep in mind the season of the year and the season of the church. The last thing to consider is when you will start preaching in the calendar year and where the church is in the season of its life. 

Arriving in January, Advent, Easter, or the start of school will impact what you preach. 

Is the church excited or hurting? Do they trust or not trust the leadership? These questions help determine their season and what they most need to hear. 

6 things you need to know before you preach your first sermon at a new church.
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While your first sermon or series doesn’t make or break your ministry at a church, it does set the tone. So it matters to get it right. 

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Every follower of Jesus is trying to grow in their spiritual practices. But what if our personalities get in the way? What if you are an introvert or an extrovert? You are stunting your spiritual growth because you only do certain spiritual practices instead of ones you tend to dislike or find uncomfortable.

I kept hearing people like Jon Tyson and John Mark Comer talk about a book I had never read, “Invitation to a Journey.” They kept saying, “It’s the best book on spiritual formation.” They were right. 

There were so many insights that stood out but easily, one of the biggest aha moments came when I read this:

Each of us will tend to develop models of spiritual life that nurture our preference pattern. If extroversion is our dominant preference, we will select models of spirituality that bring us together with other people in worship, fellowship groups, prayer groups, Bible-study groups, and spiritual-formation groups. We will want corporate spirituality and not get as much out of private individualized spirituality. If our preference is introversion, we will adopt models of spirituality that emphasize solitude, reflection, meditation, and contemplation. -Robert Mulholland Jr.

As I thought about my own life and preferences, Mulholland was right. You can see in your own life how you make your spiritual life and practices around the ones you enjoy the most. 

Now, that doesn’t mean you abandon the ones you prefer, but it does mean that we need to look at our spiritual lives and see if we are doing what we prefer or engaging in places that are not our preference. 

You might wonder, does this matter?

One thing we are often unaware of that harms our spiritual growth.
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I would say yes. 

If we only do what we enjoy or find comfortable, we will not grow all our spiritual muscles. Much like a weightlifter who only does an upper body workout, eventually, their legs will weaken. 

Think about how you experience a church or a community. Based on your preference, it is easy to elevate one practice over another. Maybe you wonder why others don’t do more of _____ or why your church doesn’t emphasize ______. Without realizing it, our preference gets elevated, and we begin to judge other Christians because they don’t do what we think is so important. That doesn’t mean it isn’t important, but we can elevate worship, prayer, or solitude over something else because it has helped us or we enjoy it more than other practices. 

This is especially important for pastors to understand. 

Unknowingly, for pastors, we create our churches around our preferences and expect others to grow the way we do. So, as a leader, you must know what you are most likely to emphasize, to make sure you are creating a well-rounded process of developing disciples. 

One thing pastors are often unaware of in their churches.
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Leaders inevitably make changes and lead to new places.

What can be disorienting for pastors and leaders is how people respond. Each time I’ve made a change, the person who got upset, sent an angry email or left the church always surprised me. Yes, sometimes the people made sense because of what I knew of them or the change we were making, but someone always surprised me.

As I thought about it, you need to understand the dynamics of change and how people fit into those dynamics.

Often, when a change is brought about, you will hear people talk about early adopters, late adopters, and everyone in between. But there are other dynamics at play in a church setting. And, just because you are an early adopter of one change or idea doesn’t mean you are an early adopter of everything. You might be, but that isn’t always the case.

Just because you are an early adopter of one change or idea doesn’t mean you are an early adopter of everything.
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As you think about any change or decision, you must consider the different groups you are communicating with. While there are more than the 3 below, I think these are the biggest ones:

People who want to keep the status quo. The status quo could be anything, but it is often to keep things as they are. The reason is that maybe they are tired of changes and transitions if there has been a lot at the church or in their life. They might think I don’t have the energy for something new, to learn something new.

They might also wonder who gets hurt in the change or who might not go along. They will often want to keep everyone happy and together, even if that means the church doesn’t move forward (whatever that might mean).

Their heart is for people. But what can happen in this group is that you are for the people already there, which isn’t bad. But it is the blind spot you have to be aware of. One change I made years ago was when someone told me honestly, “I don’t think we should make this change to reach people; people should just do what we do and like it.” And that is a real feeling.

As a pastor, you will feel this as well at different moments. When a younger leader suggests something, you think, “Do I want to learn how to do this?” I know many pastors felt this about preaching to a camera during COVID-19. Do I want to learn something new? How do I hold an iPhone for a reel, and what is a reel?!

When we feel this, we often say that we don’t have the energy for something new; we don’t want anyone to leave or get hurt because of this change.

As with all responses to change, the answer isn’t wrong, but as a pastor, you must be aware of how you speak to this group.

How to speak to the people who don’t want to follow along with a change you are making.
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People who want to return to the glory days, real or imagined. Memories are powerful, whether those memories are in our personal lives or our churches. When you are parenting teenagers and see a photo of your toddler, you long for those easier days, even though those days were filled with tantrums and sleepless nights. But you only remember the cuddly moments as you look at your gangly teenager.

The same is true in our churches. The further we get from a season of ministry, the more we romanticize the past and only remember the high moments. As you change, people will feel a pull to what was before. And you can’t compete with their memories.

The call for the good old days will often happen in a declining church. People will start to reminisce and say, “If we did what we did before, maybe it will work again.” There is also a pull for this group to keep doing things they or those they care about started. This is similar to the status quo in that it is hard to learn new things, try new things, or quit doing things that work differently than they used to. 

Pastors can feel this, too, as culture shifts and they learn new preaching or worship styles. The old days or the glory days are comfortable. 

But, instead of recreating the good old days, let’s celebrate them. Let’s thank God for what He did in that season and through that ministry or people. But, then, move forward. I often wonder if this group would feel more on board if they felt like the leaders celebrated the good old days and acknowledged the prayers and effort that went into them. 

People who want to bring change. With every change and new idea that comes up, you will have people who are ready to do it. As I said before, just because someone wants a new idea doesn’t mean they will be excited about every new idea. 

This group will jump on board, often from the very beginning. They will be your earliest cheerleaders and most prominent supporters of your change. This can be encouraging and good. But you also need to be careful not to jump too far ahead of the other two groups because you will find some wisdom that you need to be aware of within those groups. You might need to move more quickly or make the right decision. 

Here is what is essential to consider as a pastor: Often, people can switch which group they are in depending on the decision, and people are often unaware of which group they are in.

In one situation, someone may be staunchly against an idea, but then in another situation, they are the first ones to sign up. Yes, personality plays into this, but even the early adopters can find themselves wanting to hold on to the status quo of something. 

People (including the leader) are also often unaware if they are trying to keep the status quo or return to the good old days. We constantly work from what we think is best for the church, ourselves, and those around us. It usually takes a crisis or an outside perspective to help us see what we are blind to. 

The post The Three Groups in Your Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Tim Goedhart on Unsplash

You will have a season of tension or crisis at some point in your leadership or church life.

This might happen because of something you do, a decision, or a change you lead. It might happen because of what is happening outside the church in the culture, politics, or within the local school system. The tension may come from a staff transition or sin within the leadership that affects everyone. The tension may come from disagreements between the staff and leadership over a decision. Everyone is taking sides, sending texts and emails and posting on social media about which side they are taking up.

You walk through the corridors of your church, and you can feel it. Everyone can.

You stand on stage and feel the daggers coming at you, and you struggle to preach to your people and to lead them lovingly.

What do you do in those seasons? How do you lead, keep your integrity, and hold the unity of your church?

How to lead through a season of tension at your church.
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Protect your heart (and that of your spouse and kids). As losses pile up in leadership, it is hard to protect your heart. It is easy to see people as the enemy instead of the devil. But the people around you, especially those upset with you or “taking the other side,” are not the enemy. They might make you into the enemy, but don’t let that creep into your heart.

This becomes even harder to do with your spouse and kids. They will feel for you and want to protect you; people might be talking to them to get to you, or they may hear what is being said about you. This places them in particularly difficult crosshairs.

You must know how you talk about the tension and the people involved. It will be easy to unload on your spouse and kids to share things you shouldn’t share with them, especially if you feel alone. Be aware of what you share. Yes, you need someone to share this with, walk with you, and point out your sins and blindspots, but you also need to be aware of how you speak of others.

Years ago, in a counseling class I took in seminary, the professor made this comment that has always stuck with me: When a relationship is out of control in someone’s life (boss, spouse, child, parent, etc.), or something else is out of their control that is a big part of their life (job, finances, health), they will take their anger, stress and anxiety out on the next closest authority figure and that tends to be the church and the pastor. 

What is difficult to remember is that the anger and tension directed at you as the leader often has very little to do with you as the leader.

Whenever someone leaves a ministry I’m a part of, I try to meet with them to hear about their experience, what I can learn, etc. At that meeting, more than half tended to be about something else in their life that had nothing to do with me or the church. That doesn’t mean they aren’t upset, but this comment has proven to be true in my life for over 15 years.

What if your church is filled with tension?
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Prepare yourself and those around you for losses. While I would love everyone to love every change I ever made as a pastor, that just isn’t possible. Change is different. Change means loss. Change means that what you used to be no longer exists.

When changes are made, when decisions are made, losses happen. When you cut a program or ministry and let a staff member go (for whatever reason), people will be upset and leave. People will direct their anger at you. That is part of being a leader, so you must be prepared. 

What is hard about leading is the relational loss that happens. The people you thought would be excited for the change were those who used to be there but weren’t. The people who got tired from transition fatigue (which is real) went to another church. These losses will stack up for you and those around you. Your staff and elders will feel it. I remember an elder saying to me once, “I’m just not sure I can do another transition.” Not because he didn’t believe in the change or what we were doing, but simply on a human level. 

Your spouse and kids will feel these losses in acute ways. They will wonder why that person is no longer there, why their friends don’t attend church anymore, or why they won’t talk to them because of a change you, their parents, made. And that will be hard for your child to understand and for you to navigate. So prepare yourself.

Keep your integrity. You will be tempted to treat people the way they are treating you. Remember, they are acting out of hurt and anger. It is okay to be angry, but don’t sin.

Keep your integrity. Don’t fall into sin. 

This means you must figure out how to handle your hurt and emotions. You will need someone to talk with who can listen, be supportive, point out blind spots, etc. 

Just because someone lies to or about you doesn’t mean you should return the favor, just because you are treated horribly by people doesn’t give you a reason to do that. 

Just because someone lies about you or to you, doesn’t mean you should return the favor.
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Yes, people will lie to you and about you. People will act immaturely. The people who will treat you the worst will surprise you. So be prepared for that.

Walk through the lobby with your head held high. As a leader, making decisions people don’t like creates tension in your church; people are watching how you will respond and what you will do and say. You will feel their stares and see people whispering to each other in the corner while stealing glances at you.

You will want to walk over and talk to them; you will feel embarrassment, hurt, and frustration as you walk through your church. This is all natural. But walk through your church and hold your head high. They are not your enemies but the people you are called to lead and shepherd. You must stay true to what God has called you to, even if everyone doesn’t understand or go with you.

How to pastor a church in tension.
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Say what needs to be said publicly and nothing more. You will be tempted to preach a sermon series on what is happening, to pulpit shame people, but don’t. This is hard, especially if you are justice-minded and like to win. For one, the sermon isn’t for that; the sermon is for good news and hope. Two, the people you want to preach at or to aren’t listening, damaging your church and your integrity.

You don’t need to speak to everything publicly; you don’t need to refute every rumor or lie. You need to speak to some things, but for most things, you need to let go. It will fizzle out.  Eventually, the people who are upset will leave, and you will be able to move forward to what is next. 

5 ways to lead through difficult seasons at your church.
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Seasons of difficulty and tension are unavoidable in leadership. They will happen. There can be times when you grow as a leader and take your church to new places. But, they can also be seasons that take many leaders off course or out of the leadership game if you aren’t careful. 

Navigate them wisely so that you can lead not only in the season of tension but in the one that comes after (which will hopefully be a season of health and unity). 

The post How to Handle Tension at Church appeared first on JoshuaReich.org.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

It’s the summer time, which means for many pastors, they are working on their preaching calendar for the coming season and year at church. The summer is a great time to pull back as a pastor, strategically evaluate your ministry, and plan for the future.

I’m often asked by pastors and church planters about how to plan a preaching calendar. While each church is different, I think there are some things that can be important for every pastor to think through when it comes to giving your church a healthy, balanced diet of preaching.

Before getting to those questions and guideposts, you need to decide that planning ahead is a wise idea. I just heard from a worship leader who told me he finds out what his pastor is preaching on as late as Thursday. If you are that far behind, it is hard for your team to plan with you. It creates stress for your group leaders (if you discuss the sermon, which you should), and for your worship leaders who are trying to plan songs and moments.

Now, someone will say, but if you plan too far in advance, you take the Holy Spirit out of it. Yes, that is possible. It is also possible to plan too late and have no room for what the Holy Spirit says. The Holy Spirit also can move months in advance, so this is a weak argument to me. Anyone who has followed this blog for any time knows that I am a proponent of planning ahead.

I would encourage you to take a day or two to get away with your bible, some books, and your journal and listen to what God is saying for the coming year for your church.

How to plan a preaching calendar.
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What have I already preached on? It is important to know what you have already preached and not repeat it. When I came to CCC in 2021, I wanted to start with the book of Ephesians, but they had just preached on it, so I had to pivot.

Change it up if you’ve done 3 New Testament books in a row. If you’ve done 4 topical series in a row, put an expository series in.

One thing that can help with this is alternating between Old and New Testament books.

What topics do I feel my church needs to hear? This gets at who is at your church, who you are hoping to reach, and what questions your culture is asking. Every year at our church, we seek to preach about marriage and relationships; and one on generosity and money. We will hit those topics every single year regardless of what books we preach through. Why? Our culture is always asking questions about those things.

Think through the seasons of the year. You also need to think through the seasons of the year. What people are asking and thinking about in January is not what they are thinking about in September. It is important to match a series to what your people are walking through.

What haven’t I talked about recently? This helps to identify the places you gravitate towards and helps expose things you are afraid to address or have skipped. This is when you look back at your old sermon schedule and see where you’ve been. Maybe you’ve been at your church for 5 years and never preached through a gospel or an Old Testament book. That would be a good place to start.

Questions to ask as you plan your next preaching calendar.
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What am I passionate about? This can be good or bad. It is good because you have to preach what you are passionate about. Otherwise, no one will listen. It isn’t good because you can easily preach what you are only passionate about.

Where is my church going? This is a vision question. What is coming up in the next year that you can preach about? If you are praying about planting a church, preach about that. If you feel like you need to preach on generosity or grow in community, preach that vision. This means, though, as a pastor, you need to lead with vision and know where you are going.

Is there anything big coming up I need to be aware of? As we enter 2024, the election is on the horizon. one of the things I’ve been thinking through is the topics I need to teach to prepare my church to follow Jesus in the midst of election season.

7 things to keep in mind when planning a preaching calendar.
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