Tag Archives: church leadership

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4 Ways to Build a Strong, Healthy Elder Team

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Photo by Benjamin Child on Unsplash

One of the most critical but often overlooked parts of being a lead pastor is interacting with and relating to your elder team. If you get this right, you will find smooth sailing and incredible momentum that is felt throughout the church. If you get this wrong, it can lead to many difficulties, frustration, and heartache on the part of the lead pastor, the elder team, and, ultimately, the church.

Over different seasons, I have gotten this right and gotten it wrong.

Recently, I was reading CEO Excellence: The Six Mindsets That Distinguish the Best Leaders from the Rest, and the authors have a whole section on the interactions between the CEO and the board of a company. They are: 

  • Choosing radical transparency
  • Building a strong relationship with the board chair
  • Reaching out to individual directors (elders)
  • Exposing the board to management

Let’s take them one at a time and apply them to churches:

4 important lessons for lead pastors and their elder team.

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Choosing radical transparency. It is amazing to hear how much or little pastors tell their elder teams. I get that it can be hard, and often as a lead pastor, you are dealing with your old wounds and scars as you step into trusting this group.

But one thing you should always strive to do is tell your elder team what is going on. Don’t hide things from them. If something happens in your church or you think something is going to happen, make sure they know before it happens or as quickly as possible.

There have been times I’ve told my elder team something might happen, and then it didn’t happen. But that openness has brought about a lot of trust and confidence. And many times, my current elder team has said, “Thanks for keeping us in the loop.” That trust goes a long way.

Building a strong relationship with the board chair. This person is the lead pastor in some churches, but I don’t think that’s wise.

Our church calls this person the elder facilitator to clarify what this person does, which I like more than the board chair. But whatever you call this person, it may be the person with the longest tenure or most influence on your board, whoever they are, build a relationship with them. They can be an incredible help to you in terms of advice, moving things forward, and getting a sense of what each person needs or where the church is, especially if you are new.

4 things pastors and elder teams must do to work well together.

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Reaching out to individual directors (elders). While the elder team works as a team, it is crucial to understand each person who serves on that team. Get to know their personalities, how they think and process things, their histories, theologies, and passions for ministry.

One of the things I do is meet with each elder individually throughout the year. I get feedback from them on how I’m doing, how the team is doing, and what they see and hear in the church.

If things get off track, they can be a pastor’s greatest asset and the first line of defense. But you have to invest in them relationally.

Exposing the board to management. This one is important but often tricky in a church setting. It is really important to clarify your governance and who answers to whom. In our setting, I, as the lead pastor, answer to our elder team, but everyone on staff answers to me. While the elder team is ultimately responsible for our church, they don’t oversee the staff. So the staff doesn’t have two bosses. In some church settings, this can get confusing. Clarifying this first is crucial to a healthy church team.

Once this is clear, you must figure out how to connect your staff and elder team. Unfortunately, many churches keep them apart, which can lead to disaster. 

One of the ways we do this is through reports that staff write or give to the elder team; we also connect one elder with each staff member to meet once a month to connect, pray together and have that elder attend one team meeting for that ministry each year. The elders then report to the whole elder team about how things are going in that area and what the elders should know and celebrate. 

The relationship between a lead pastor and elder team often makes or breaks a church.

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Many lead pastors, unfortunately, are suspicious of their boards or see them as getting in the way. Working well with your board will relieve so many headaches and heartaches and make your church stronger and healthier. 

4 ways to work well with your elder team.

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The Seasons of Leadership & Church

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Photo by Skull Kat on Unsplash

Recently, I gave a sermon on the seasons of life and family at my church. As I thought about it, there is a lot of application to it for pastors and churches.

When you think about the year’s seasons, there are joys and challenges in each season. There are things we love about each year’s season and things we dislike about each season.

Here’s a way to think about each season:

Winter is the season of hibernation and resting, holding steady. It is also the season of sadness, sickness, and loneliness. There are seasons in life and family of sorrow, illness, and loneliness. Seasons of resting and clearing the calendar to sit by the fire. Winter is also the season of preparation because you aren’t doing other activities. 

In the church world, this can be the times of vacations and breaks throughout the year, the season when you are evaluating ministries and thinking through budgets and plans. It is also the time when your staff is resting and on vacation.

While it can feel like nothing is happening in winter, many things are happening in winter.

Spring is the season of new beginnings and opportunities, the season of hope. Life is blooming. This season can feel like a shotgun went off. Like it is all of a sudden busy. Everything is happening at once. This season can start with a new job, opportunity, or school year. I remember a farmer telling me once that to have a great fall; you have to jump on the opportunity in spring and work harder than you think. 

In the church world, this can be the beginning of a new series, ministry season, program, or the start of a church. The beginning is fun and chaotic; you feel like you are building the plane as you are flying.

Summer is the season of growth, enjoyment, and fun. Summer is the season of life when you begin to see the payoff for some of what you did in life. In the summer, you also need to be pruning your life to live effectively and at a sustainable pace. In farming, you are weeding, protecting what matters to you. Summer can also be the time you are tempted to sit back, but if you do, that’s when you can lose your crop. 

In the church world, summer is when you are fixing what you are doing and tweaking this or that to make improvements on something. You are having meetings to keep everyone on the same page, staying unified, and moving in the same direction as a church and staff.

Fall is the harvest season. We reap all that we have sown in the fall. Fall is when you see the results of what you did and either celebrate or lament. Fall is also the season of change; the leaves change, and the weather gets colder. Fall is also the time that you prepare for winter. You winterize your house and pipes. The same is true in life and relationships. You need to prepare for winter. 

One way to think of the fall season in churches is to see it through the lens of the harvest, big days. Days like Easter Sunday or a baptism Sunday. When you sit back and see the hard work of walking with people, those days are also the beginning of journeys for those people, and you start cycles of discipleship with people.

Which season is your church in right now? And how does that change how you lead and work as a church?

Now, something more personal as a leader: I think each pastor and leader has a season they are best. Do you know which season of the life of your church you are best suited for? What about the others on your team?

It isn’t enough to know which season your church is in; you also need to know where your leadership muscles are the strongest.

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Three Important Categories for Leaders

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A few weeks ago, I was at the Drive Conference in Atlanta and heard Joel Thomas layout three important categories for leaders. Since then, I’ve been chewing on it because I think they are critical, and they also explain some frustrations we have as leaders if we don’t understand them.

Identity 

Identity is who you are. Your role in life as a husband, wife, parent, friend, boss, and child of God. 

These are also the roles you play outside of leadership and ministry; the hobbies that you have, the interests you give your time to. 

This is hard for us to think about, but this is the foundation of leadership. Too often, as leaders, our identity is wrapped up in what we do or our ability. 

Your identity is formed in a lot of ways that affect your leadership. 

It started years ago in your family of origin. It is formed in early experiences in school and friendships as you grow up. Your experiences and the heartaches shape it, as well as the celebrations you experience through life. 

If you grew up and learned not to trust people or that people can’t be trusted (real hurts), that shapes how you interact with people around you and how much trust you give to others. If you were raised to believe that what you did was the most important thing about you, that shapes how you go about leadership and teamwork.

Your story affects how you interact, show up, your motivations and how you trust or do not trust those around you. 

Connected to this is understanding how you are wired. You need to know your personality, motivations, desires, and fears. You also need to understand the things you carry from your past: shame, hurt and other parts of your story. 

Those things about you shape your identity as a leader and are easily overlooked.

Calling

Calling is what you feel like God has called you to do with your life. 

We define that differently. And we talk about how that calling comes to us in different ways, but we have it. 

Some feel called to be a pastor, in ministry, etc. You may feel called to leadership in the marketplace, a non-profit; your calling may be to eradicate something. But all of us have that calling. 

We get tripped when we confuse identity and calling. They are connected but not the same. 

And let me say this, being a pastor is a calling, but it’s also a job. A job that you will one day leave and retire from. 

In many ways, identity is who you are, calling is what you do with that or because of that.  

Identity is who you are, calling is what you do with that or because of that.

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John Onwuchekwa said, “You HAVE a calling FROM God. You ARE a child OF God.”

Assignment

Your assignment is what God has called you to now. Your assignment right now might be to be a lead pastor, associate pastor, church planter, elder, or volunteer. 

Your assignment is your current season. It may be just beginning. You may be ending an assignment and figuring out what’s next. 

Again, we can confuse our calling with an assignment. We can also confuse our assignment with our identity. Many pastors and leaders don’t know where they end and where their church begins, which leads to all kinds of unhealthy things. 

Assignments can last decades, and they can last for a year. Assignments can change at the drop of a hat when you aren’t aware. 

These categories are critical to understand and keep separate. If we confuse them, we will find ourselves in some dangerous places as leaders and watch our hearts erode. 

3 areas leaders need to be aware of.

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How to Survive Monday as a Pastor

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It’s Monday.

For most pastors, worship leaders, kids, and student pastors, this means the hardest and worst day of the week. Sadly, many pastors resign on Monday.

There are a variety of reasons why Mondays are so hard for pastors:

  • In the spiritual sense, what we do is warfare. You may have had to deal with a relational battle yesterday. You prayed with people, counseled people, and are carrying their burdens and weight. You have shepherded them through difficulties, wept with them, challenged them to walk away from sin, and watched people destroy their lives one step at a time.
  • You slept terribly on Saturday night as you thought about the day, got up early, and then slept poorly on Sunday night as you were simply too tired to sleep or you are carrying criticisms and weights from the conversations you had.
  • Leading worship, preaching, and talking with people is incredible and the highlight of my week but it is also incredibly exhausting all at the same time. You physically have nothing left after a Sunday. You probably have nothing left spiritually, emotionally, or relationally to give as well.
  • There is a good chance you woke up on Monday to a pile of emails from angry people, or people leaving your church, or thinking about leaving your church. You may have some fires brewing that you are wondering if you can handle. Maybe there is an elder or a staff member or volunteer that is a thorn in your side. And you are tired.

So what do you do?

While every Monday doesn’t feel like this and isn’t this hard, many of them are. Because of this, many pastors take Monday off. If you do, that’s fine. But I feel like that is making a hard day worse. Your family doesn’t want you around if you are going to be angry, grumpy, and have a short temper.

Here are a few things that have helped me and my family survive Mondays:

Get out of bed. While I don’t set my alarm most Mondays, you definitely don’t want to sleep too long. Get moving as soon as you can.

Know that Tuesday is coming. Most of the things that seem insurmountable on Monday look easy on Tuesday. I’m amazed at how often I get stressed about things and in 3 weeks’ time I have forgotten about them.

Get a workout, bike ride, hike, or run in. I know, you are tired and can barely move. The adrenaline from preaching is hard to deal with the older I get. I actually do yoga every Sunday afternoon as a way to breathe, calm down and pray. Get going, do something active. It gets your blood moving and you are in a better mood afterward.

Take a nap. You should take a nap on Monday. You will probably have very little steam by the end of the day, so lay down.

Pray for your people. Know that while you are tired, they are also tired as they walk into their worlds today. Pray for their faithfulness, courage to follow Jesus, and the burdens they are carrying in their lives. I know that you do this, but praying for them also helps to remind you of why you do what you do and keeps you focused on others on a day that is easy to throw a pity party. 

Work on your soul. Read something that speaks to your soul. You preached your heart out, gave everything you had to students and kids, led worship with everything you had, and now you need to feed yourself. Monday is a great time to listen to a sermon by someone else to be challenged.

How to work on your heart as a pastor.

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Don’t be around anyone that makes you angry. On Monday, you have a short fuse so do yourself and others a favor and only be around people you like. The fallout from not following this can be bad for everyone involved. If you can, connect with a friend or someone who is life-giving to you.

Do administrative stuff. Don’t have a meeting on Monday, don’t counsel anyone. I know lots of leaders like to evaluate on Monday because it is fresh, but write it down, and talk about it on Tuesday. Return some emails, blog, following up with guests, and new believers, those are fun and invigorating for a pastor.

Serve your wife. You were probably a bear to be around at some point on Saturday or Sunday. She was a single mom on Sunday with your kids while you worked and she is just as tired as you are. I know you don’t believe me and think your job is harder, let’s say it is even. Ask how you can serve her.

You have the privilege to do it again in 6 days. That may not seem like a privilege on Monday, but believe me, it is. God has chosen you to preach, lead worship, teach, counsel, shepherd, set up, greet, help kids follow Jesus, and talk with students through hard situations. He chose you and uses you. So, when Monday is hard, remember, God could’ve picked someone else. And you could’ve said no. Since God called and you said yes, get back up on the horse and get ready!

How to survive Monday as a Pastor.

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How Pastors Miss What’s Happening in Their Church

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Recently I was sitting with a group of pastors who all had the same reaction to what was going on in their churches.

Surprise.

Each pastor thought things were going relatively well before covid. They thought their church was healthy because they saw a number of people getting baptized, they met first-time guests each week and they had a full room.

Yet, the surprise came because as we have walked through covid it has revealed what is actually happening beneath the surface of our churches. It has revealed who we really are and how we are really doing.

Do you really know where your church is and what’s happening in your church?

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What if you didn’t need a crisis to know what is happening in your church?

The other thing that makes this a challenge is that the longer you are at a church, the longer you are in leadership, the further you get from what is happening. And, people don’t like to give you bad news, so all you hear are good things.

As a leader you must make sure you have ways to find out how things are actually going in your church.

Here’s how:

3 things to watch if you are a pastor.

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1. Staff & volunteer turnover. The longer you lead, the more change you will see in your staff and volunteer base. This happens for all kinds of reasons: people move for a job, they transition to be closer to family, the role they were in is no longer their passion or they have outgrown it, or they haven’t kept up with the growth of the church. Not all turnover is bad.

But, all turnover is data you need to be aware of. If, in the last few years, you have had a high turnover rate in your staff, do you know why? If you do exit interviews (and you should), don’t dismiss the information you receive from them, even if you don’t like what you hear.

High turnover tells a story that you need to know about as a leader.

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On the flip side of this, it can also be unhealthy if you have no new voices or leaders at the top levels of your organization. This doesn’t mean you need to promote people past their ability or fire anyone. But, the longer you are a leader the more comfortable you get with the leaders you have around you, and the less you want new voices in that circle.

Be aware of that temptation and make sure you have ways for new voices to speak into what is happening at a church.

2. Why do people stay and leave your church. This is connected to the first one. But do you know why people come to your church? Do you know what keeps them? Do you know why people are leaving your church? It isn’t always good or bad, but you need to know.

Do you know why people come to your church? Do you know why people are leaving your church?

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As much as possible when people leave your church, talk to them. Take them to coffee and see what you can learn from them. They may or may not want to talk with you, but it is worth trying to find out.

When someone new comes to your church and gets connected, find out what kept them. Ask them how they found you, why they came back a second time or a third time. Ask them what made them get engaged. This helps you to know what is working and not working in your church.

How to know what is working and not working in your church.

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3. New life, groups, and baptisms. This is all about new life, about the next steps being taken.

If you haven’t seen any new groups getting started or new leaders being raised up, there is a problem with your groups, assimilation, or leadership development system. If you aren’t seeing people cross the line of faith or people getting baptized, then you need to step back and ask why.

It is easy to see a crowd in a room and think you are doing well. But you need to dig into the steps people are taking or not taking. 

Are people stepping up to volunteer and join teams? Or is it the same people who have always done it?

I know, as a leader, it is easier to pretend things are working just fine and it is hard to know after covid where people are. But your job as a leader is to know reality and define it for your church so that you can lead through it. 

3 things to keep an eye on in your church.

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10 Lies Leaders Love

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This is from Tim Irwin’s new book Impact: Great Leadership Changes Everything. It is a list of the lies leaders believe that drive self-deception in their lives and often lead to not reaching their potential or falling completely out of the leadership game because of moral failure. They are lies leaders tell themselves to allow them to act in ways they shouldn’t. Sadly, I have believed these at different times and have seen countless pastors fall prey to them.

  1. I’m the smartest person in the room. I have better ideas and better judgement than anyone on the team.
  2. I’m responsible for these results. They could not have done this without me. I did this. 
  3. Everyone is out to get me because they are envious. I am so good, and they can’t stand it. They know I’m on the fast track and are going to try to get me off track.
  4. These people work for me. They have to deliver to my standards. I need them to focus on helping me.
  5. I don’t have to follow normal rules…I deserve special consideration. I have a big job and need to ignore some rules to get my goals accomplished.
  6. I’m entitled to that. I worked hard and made this place what it is. This place was a wreck before I took over. Through my leadership we are finally making some money.
  7. It’s not material. This is a rounding error. No one would begrudge me for taking this.
  8. No one will ever know. We can fudge these numbers a little. Next quarter should be spectacular, and we can restate this quarter’s earnings.
  9. It’s not my fault. I did everything I was supposed to do. Those other guys dropped the ball.
  10. I don’t need to be accountable to anyone. Nobody here really understands what I’m trying to do. It’s only results that the board is after, and I can get those if the rest of the team would get out of my way.

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